Path to Self Discovery
by bleed4her
Summary: Bella was born human, but a little extra as well. She needs some help to put together some long lost pieces. Rated M for later chapters. Femslash. First Bellice/Twi-fic so please be nice :P
1. Prologue

**Prologue**

**La Push/Forks Washington 1924**

_What do I do?_ She paces. _This can't be real...I can't be real. Humans, vampires, werewolves...me. What am I? _She hears them and stumbles as she begins to run through the darkness. Her heart is pounding and she can feel the intense heat surrounding her.

"Isabelle stop! Please, we can help you."

_Not on your life!_ She runs faster, striving to get away. _Just a little further..._ She felt it when she was clear...when they would no longer come for her.

She had no idea why and wouldn't know for years why they suddenly stopped coming for her just as she crossed the creek bed.


	2. Ch 1 Let's Start at the Beginning

**Ch. 1 Let's start at the beginning.**

"So Bella, are you ready for your first day?" Karen asked as she passed Bella a glass of juice and a plate of toast.

"Well it's not like it's _really_ my first day..." I replied sitting at the counter. "I have gone to school before you know." She didn't mean to sound rude but smiled slightly towards her foster mother in a slight apology.

"I know that, Bella but it's not like it was here. All your running off and being bounced around it will be good for you. It's your senior year so please just try to make the best of it and get through it. Then you can go anywhere you please. Alright?"

I nodded, "I know. I'm sorry I know you mean well. It's weird, being back in this town..." I ran a nervous hand through my hair, "I'm grateful to you for taking me in. I know you didn't have to."

"I wanted to. I knew your great grandfather, Charlie. He was a good man and my father respected him greatly. I see a lot of you in him. I'm glad to have the last of his line here in my home. He did me a great deed once when I was a child." Karen smiled and touched my face softly.

"I remember." Sitting down my glass I looked up in time to notice her confused expression. "Well, the story...one of the few things I do remember. I'm glad he found you. He said that was a scary night for him...his best friend's daughter lost in the woods." I cleared my throat, "He always said you were a lucky girl."

"Nah, he was a lucky man." She smiled. "Okay better get going you don't want to be late. Are you sure you want to walk, I could always drive you?"

"I'm good. I think the walk would be nice anyway. I know I spent my early days here but it'll be interesting to see how it's changed." I got up and grabbed my jacket and school bag turning hearing Karen laugh.

"Oh Bella, you're 17 going on 70." Off my look she elaborated, "You said your 'early days' instead of childhood and honestly you were only two so it'll be as if you've never seen the place. I'm surprised you remember the town at all!"

"Yeah well, pictures and old news clippings help. Sometimes." I looked down and headed for the door.

"Bella? I know it hurts...losing your family but maybe being here where the family begun will help you pick up the pieces. You're a good girl, Isabella. Your entire family was. You have a lot of life to live...I just want to see you make the most of it. I'm here...for whatever you need."

"Thanks Karen. That means a lot. I'll be okay." I smiled and turned making my way to school.

I took a deep breath and sighed as I walked along the street towards Forks High. This town hadn't changed much, Karen was right. "I can't believe I'm back here." I mumbled to myself. All I wanted was to try and figure out some of the minor and finer details of my life and heritage. I snorted. Who knew after 85 years of drifting in and out of cities, suburbs and small towns similar to this it had to be **this** town's police force to take notice and pick up a minor here alone.

All in all I was lucky. Really lucky. Anywhere else I would have gone into the system at least for a year and have my life poked around in...figure out who I was where I was from. Not here. Here, bless my stars I met Karen. A long time friend of the family who was able to convince the local police that she was the closest thing I had to my family. She was. She knew my father. Well, she knows him as my great grandfather. She hasn't been too nosey...at least not yet. When I finally got the nerve to confront her, she told me she knew I was coming. Her father had told her I would need her help, her guidance and that's why she came to my rescue. As far as the local police (and my file as I learned they made on me) were concerned my parents were the only living relatives I had and they were killed in an auto accident three years ago and I was a drifter ever since.

My parents weren't killed in a car accident.

My father was dead. He was killed barely after my 17th birthday. My mother...disappeared. I felt she was still alive however. I've been searching for her ever since.

I looked up noticing I had made it. As I began to walk up the stairs to the administration office a guy on a skateboard came rushing towards me nearly knocking me backwards. Luckily I twisted just enough to fall sideways and land on my knees and palms. "Ouch."

"Watch where you're going you jerk!" A soft female voice called out to the quickly disappearing skater. I felt a hand touch my shoulder as I was picking myself up. "Hey, you're Bella right? I'm Angela. Are you okay?"

I looked down, quite startled as I took in my scrapped and slightly bleeding palms. "Yeah...fine. Just a scratch."

Angela smiled and picked up my bag and handed it to me. "Aunt Karen told me to meet you out front here...sorry I didn't find you in time to stop your near collision."

"It's fine, really. It does sting though." I said absentmindedly as I looked at my hands again. I looked up as I felt Angela taking my right hand into hers.

"Well, you did scrape them up pretty good, the skin is pulled back a bit. You seem surprised at the pain." She paused looking at me carefully, "You're not gonna pass out at the sight of blood are you?"

She was worried yet I could see she was also a bit amused. "No, just haven't scraped myself up in a while."

"Well come on, we'll go get you cleaned up and check in with admin to get your schedule all worked out and I can show you around. I'm pretty sure you will have all the same classes as me. " She smiled leading us into the building.

"How do you figure that?" I asked as we reached the admin desk.

"Aunt Karen has quite a bit of pull in this little town. She pulled a couple strings and made sure we had the same schedule. She wanted you to hit it off and have a friend." Angela smiled and sat down in a chair as I filled out a form and got my class list from the receptionist who eyed me oddly.

"And what if you didn't want to accept her job to play friend and tour guide to the new girl?" I asked smiling.

"I didn't actually. I volunteered." She stood up and took off down the hallway.

I quickly followed behind her knowing Angela would be a good friend to have. I was a loner. A drifter. Drifter...that was my name for years...at least with the last bunch I was with. I never felt comfortable with my real name with them. Too many questions. But something was telling me I could trust Angela. I smiled, "Hey wait up!" I didn't want her thinking I was too crazy on my first day. That would come soon enough. Taking one last look at my palms I shook my head and put my hands into my jacket pocket. It wasn't the first time it had happened. I'd hopefully figure that out more later.


	3. Ch 2 Forbidden Fruit?

**Ch. 2 Who said the forbidden fruit was an apple?**

Karen was good. Just as Angela had predicted we had all the same classes. The first few went by in a blur. I had to go through introductions in each class, which seemed silly as a lot of the same people were there hearing it again. "It's such a small town." I mumbled. Hearing Angela giggle I turned my head to the side. "Sorry I just can't get over it. The last few places I lived were much bigger."

Angela looked at me thoughtfully. "You've seen a lot the last few years haven't you, Drifter?"

My head snapped up at the name and I froze.

Angela laughed, "Why do you look like you've seen a ghost? I'm sorry, Aunt Karen just said you were drifting along the last few years and you kept telling the cops your name was Drifter." She smiled, "Kinda cool but I don't think they found it amusing."

"Yeah well, I didn't like telling people my real name. You never know who or what you're dealing with now days." I stopped talking, not understanding why I kept slipping up around this girl. I have to be more careful.

"Very true. If you don't like it I will stop. I didn't mean to upset you in any way." Angela turned the corner and I noticed we were in the school cafeteria. "Hungry?" She asked me.

I nodded my head slightly and followed her to grab a few items and we sat at a small table in the middle. She introduced me to a few friends, all that I had introduced myself to in one of the last 3 classes at least. "You're right, it is a really small town." We laughed.

As I was taking a bite of my roll I couldn't help but feel as if something was floating about in my head. I immediately looked up to notice a group of vampires at a far table. They were acting as if they were having lunch but I knew better. Just like I knew what they were. There were five of them. Two, a very gorgeous petite female and a lanky bronze haired boy had been staring at me but now were intently staring at each other. I snickered causing Angela to glance over my shoulder and back at me.

"I see you've noticed the Cullen's. And apparently..." she paused for dramatic affect before leaning her head closer to mine, "they've noticed you."

I swallowed nervously after the scent of her strawberry shampoo hit me like a wave from the past and I tightened my eyes and took a deep breath. Looking at her briefly I turned back towards the vampires. "Yeah I noticed the two on the end there staring at me. Fun, fun being the new girl."

Angela looked over and I could tell she was eyeing the petite female with black hair. If I didn't know better I would say it was almost jealousy she looked at her with. Maybe she liked the bronze haired guy? He laughed then as if he had heard what I just thought. Weird.

"Maybe." Angela started then turned her attention back to me. "Well, I know you were introduced to Jasper and Emmett last period in History. Rosalie, the blonde is Emmett's girlfriend. Jasper and Rosalie Hale are twins. Edward is the lanky guy on the end and the girl that seems to have your attention is Alice. Alice and Edward are Dr and Mrs Cullen's first adopted kids, then they adopted Jasper and Rosalie and apparently Emmett just a few years ago.

I nodded listening to her introduction of the family. Adopted. Sure if that's what these vampires are calling their coven. The two oldest must be the sires. I can't say I've seen this big of a coven before...only heard tell of one in Italy. I had heard some vampires can roam about humans at will but this big of a coven, and they are attending school? I wonder what the death tolls are like. Again, as if he had heard me, Edward, as Angela called him suddenly stabbed his fork into his plate and had an irritated look on his face. It was then it dawned on me what Angela had said about Alice having my attention.

"What?" I turned to meet her eyes and knew I had been busted once again in my silence previously. "I was just...it's odd how they all look somewhat alike yet they are all adopted children. Aside from the Hale's that is."

Angela turned back again slightly and then back to me, "Yeah they tend to keep to themselves for the most part though. They just moved here from Alaska two years ago and no one knows too much about them except everyone loves Dr. Cullen."

"He works at the local hospital?" I asked. He works around bleeding humans all day? Wonder how old he is.

"Yeah he's a lifesaver that's for sure. " We've been thankful to have him here.

Nodding absently I sighed. "Angela, why did you say you volunteered to show me around and all? You don't even know me. I could be some psycho killer."

Angela laughed and touched my shoulder lightly. It tingled. I stared into her vaguely familiar eyes and waited for her answer. "I like making friends and Aunt Karen adores you. I figured we would hit it off. But hey, if you don't want to be my friend that's up to you..." she trailed off looking slightly pained.

"NO!" I said a little too loud and then recovered, "I mean, of course I want to be your friend. I was just curious, that's all." I smiled and my breath hitched as she leaned in to bump our shoulders and I was hit with the smell of her shampoo again.

"Bella are you okay?" She asked and tilted her head to the side to keep eye contact with me.

I nodded, unsure at the moment of what to say. Ever since I had come back into this town I was having a hard time with memories of the past. One in particular was slamming into me right now like a freight train and I didn't understand why. Of course it always bothered me but I could usually keep it locked away. It must be this town...and something...something about Angela was helping to trigger it. That's when I remembered...

"_Elizabeth!" I called out as I ran barefoot through the soft grass. The sun was shining and it was a beautiful day out. "I say woman, you best come out and not try and give me a fright like last time! I'll not fall for it again!" I giggled twirling around in the sunshine until a soft body collided with my own and sent us rolling down a small hill in the middle of the meadow._

_We laughed until we finally came for a stop at the bottom of the hill tangled in the flowers and ferns around us. "Well I had to try." Elizabeth laughed and leaned over to pull a dandelion out of my hair. "If I recall you were the last to pull one over on me three days ago, Miss Swan when I thought that blasted lake had swallowed you up!"_

"_Aiy alright. So does this make us even now, Beth?" I giggled and laid back, enjoying the sun._

_Elizabeth was silent and propped her head up on her hand and gazed over at me. "Perhaps...or perhaps I still feel I am owed a little something extra. After all, I thought something horrid happened to my only friend."_

_I grinned and blushed furiously as I rose up and leaned over to her. I closed my eyes, breathing in the scent of strawberries and gently pressed my lips to hers. After a few moments we pulled back and stared at each other. "What we do here, must never be found out. Father wouldn't like it, and you would be forced sooner than you already are."_

_Elizabeth frowned, "I know my Belle, I know. We must enjoy what we have, for time is short. Shorter than either of us might think."_

"Bella? Bella are you okay?" Angela asked, waving her hand in front of my face. I could tell she was worried...something in her eyes almost begging for forgiveness. Why would she need to ask forgiveness?

"Yes, sorry. I'm being terribly rude. I don't know what happened I just sort of dazed off some place." I apologized and stood up as I noticed others were heading back to classes.

"It looked like you were remembering something..." Angela pressed slightly walking with me towards our next class. I noticed she turned slightly watching as the Cullen's filed out and to their respective classes.

"Yes, I was...the past. That's all. I'd rather not talk about it if you don't mind. I mean no disrespect." I hoped I wasn't hurting her feelings but I couldn't hash it out. Not now...possibly not ever. I was a monster.

No sooner had the thought left my mind did I notice Edward Cullen looking at me as if he were trying to read me. He half smiled and cocked his head to the side. The look I saw was curious. I turned away from him and hurried on with Angela. It wouldn't do well to start off my first day late.


	4. Ch 3 Internal Invasion

**Ch. 3 Internal invasion of personal space.**

I sat down in my psych class next to Alice Cullen herself. Angela was a couple rows over and shrugged apologetically. Pulling out my notepad I started to work copying down notes from the overhead screen on the wall. Angela had warned me this teacher was a big fan of note-taking. Half-way through my first page my ink pen stopped working. I dug through my backpack looking for the others I brought. Before I had a chance to reach one a small white hand reached over to me holding a pen. "Here you go, Isabella." The silky voice whispered to me with a smile.

"Thanks." I whispered back taking the pen. I noticed Alice pulled her hand back a little quicker than necessary when our fingers touched briefly. She looked as if she was holding her breath as she eyed me for my reaction. I smiled back, something comforting about her topaz eyes. She's not a feeder. I shook my head softly, "It's okay. Cold hands don't bother me." I whispered back and went back to taking my notes with her pen. I grinned to myself knowing I was leading her to believe I knew what she was, and it may have been too soon for that but I didn't care. I had things to find out and a coven of vampires in my home town may just know how to help me figure it all out. I just have to figure out if they can be trusted first.

The rest of the day went by smoothly. It turned out that I had two classes with Alice and my last class of the day was with Edward. I noticed him keeping tabs on me off and on through class. I couldn't figure out what was so intriguing to him but then I realized I was being ignorant. I had only been in Forks with Karen for about a week. Before that, I had been Drifter, roaming from city to city and most of the time in the company with other vampires off and on. He could sense it on me. I smirked. It was throwing him off...a human, with a faint sent of a vampire. It didn't make sense I'm sure.

"No, it doesn't. Care to elaborate?" He spoke evenly and stared directly at me.

"I don't know you. I have nothing to explain to you." I didn't want to be rude but something about him didn't settle with me. Besides the fact that he could obviously read my mind. He smirked. Smug creature aren't you? I thought. He grinned again. Shaking my head I worked on building a wall in my mind. Noticing his look and the shifting in his chair I knew I was succeeding. He couldn't read me. I'll let him stew on that some until I figure out who best to approach for information when I'm ready. I wasn't sure why but Alice was jumping into my thoughts. His head snapped around toward me once again. I'm going to have to get better at my wall around this one. "Butt out, mind reader." I whispered and stood up just as the bell rang and made my way out with Angela.

"I noticed Edward speaking to you..." she started and I shook my head. "Yeah he's creeping me out...I don't think I like him."

Edward brushed past us, looking back, "I'm not sure what to make of you, Isabella. But I'll check with Alice." And with that he strode off.

"Check with Alice? What is he talking about?" Angela asked genuinely confused.

"I honestly don't know...we didn't speak of her and I only talked to her once in Psych." We continued walking until we hit the parking lot and she pulled me away from the sidewalk towards the parking lot. "Oh I don't have a car yet..."

"No, but I do. Come on, I'll give you a ride home."

I stopped and started to object when she spoke. "I know you're going to say it's out of my way but I'm headed to La Push to meet up with Jacob anyway so no objections." She smiled and started up her car.

"Jacob is your boyfriend?" I asked and smiled. "No, Yes." She said so quickly it was as if two people were speaking at the same time.

She laughed then and shook her head, "Sorry. Yes we are...things have been a little off lately but we are. Sorry if I seemed a little spazzed there for a second."

"Not to worry." I smiled back and watched as we quickly approached the house.

"Jacob Black is his name. He lives and goes to school on the reservation. I only get to see him a couple days a week after school and the weekends...hardly seems like enough!" She laughed. "He's having a bonfire tonight with some friends. Actually...would you like to come? I'm sure he wouldn't mind. I told him you were starting school with me today."

"No...no that's okay. I should just go in and finish up on homework. I'm not ready to go back to La Push anyway." I climbed out of the car, hoping she didn't catch my 'back'.

She smiled and didn't appear to have noticed. "Okay well, see you tomorrow, Drifter." She smirked and pulled away as I waved back at her. I took a deep breath and made my way indoors and upstairs to my room.

This town was going to take a toll on me...I could only hope I was ready for what was to come. I needed answers, so ready or not I didn't have a choice.


	5. Ch 4 Can You Hear Me Now?

**Ch. 4 Can you hear me now?**

The next few weeks went by pretty quickly. They were uneventful which I would like to say was nice for a change, but it was getting me nowhere. I was getting better at blocking out Edward so he wasn't able to pry into my thoughts. When I was ready to talk to them they'd know and maybe they could help me.

None of them have bothered me really. I get a few stares now and then and Alice speaks to me in Psych and gym class. It's mostly about the homework or the task in class at hand but she seems sweet enough. The weather had been nice the last few days and the Cullen's were all gone. Angela told me it was because the family goes out for camping and activities when it's nice but I knew better. They couldn't be seen in the sun. I wondered if they used this time to hunt as well? Obviously they ate animals if they were still living, their eyes weren't red and the death rate in this small town wasn't up to unrealistic proportions.

As I sat down in Psych class I noticed Alice was in attendance. "Hey Alice." I spoke softly smiling at her. She turned quickly, as if shocked I had spoken to her.

"Hey Bella." She smiled back and seemed to focus on me slightly as her eyes glazed over. She went very quiet for about 30 seconds before shaking her head and looking down slightly. "Sorry." She smiled again and I knew if it was possible, she would have blushed.

I looked at her for a few seconds debating before I spoke, "Alice...could I ask you a favour?" I waited for her response which barely took a second.

"Of course." She turned in her chair to face me expectantly. I started to wonder if Edward had heard me earlier today when I was mulling over the decision in my mind but his aggravated look told me he still couldn't.

"I need to talk to you...and perhaps your entire family. Could we meet somewhere private?" As I spoke she was writing down something on a sheet of paper and gently pulled it from her notebook.

"This is my address. Come whenever you are ready. We'll be there." She smiled and turned towards the front of the class as the teacher began his lecture.

She was writing as I was asking. She knew what I was asking. Her brother can hear my thoughts...well when I want him to. And she knew what I was asking. Could she read minds? Alice...Alice can you hear me? Dumb. She was effortlessly jotting down the notes as if unaware of me. Maybe she can see the future...I've only met one seer...but I suppose anything is possible. I wonder what her trigger is to seeing visions unless she can just look for things of her own free will. Debating over it...I had to try. I needed to know what she was capable of. Reaching into my bag I looked around for a pen. Finding one I took it out and held it. I thought about tossing it over onto her lap. After a few moments I tossed the pen towards Alice. I noticed she hadn't been writing for the last few seconds but was staring off towards the overhead screen. Without skipping a beat her left hand jerked down and caught then pen just before it hit her lap. Smirking, she turned towards me and gave me a full blown smile as she realized what I had done and nodded her head at me.

After school was over it took some convincing but I was able to talk Angela into letting me walk home. She offered to give me a ride as she was heading back out to see Jacob but I declined telling her I wanted to explore in town a bit and then head home. Being a Friday we didn't have to worry about homework or school for two days so it would be nice to explore some.

After Angela had gone I walked across the street for a payphone to call a cab. Just as I had begun to dial the numbers a silver Volvo pulled up next to me. Edward was at the wheel with Jasper in the passenger seat and Alice in the back. "If I knew it was tonight I would have just offered you to ride with us rather than giving you the address." Alice smiled and opened the door, "hop in."

"Thanks." I replied as I climbed in back with her and nodded my head to Jasper and Edward.

"So how do you do it?" Edward asked, looking at me in the rear view mirror. I started to feel irritated then suddenly felt a wave of calm come over me when I noticed Jasper looking back at me as well.

"Oh give me a break." I muttered to myself. "What can Rosalie and Emmett do?" I asked exasperated. I figured the Cullen's would be able to help me out but I had no idea they each had some extra abilities. As if they needed anymore.

Alice smirked and giggled slightly at my little outburst and Jasper nodded obviously amused. "She's perceptive."

"I've been around a while." I replied. "So are you going to answer my question?" I asked looking between the three of them as I noticed us pulling up to a very large house. Climbing out, Edward looked at me from over the hood of the car.

"You didn't answer mine. How do you do it...I could hear you perfectly at first and then off and on when you were building your silly brick wall but now...nothing. You have to be thinking something." He stared at me...still trying to figure it out.

"Honestly, I'm not sure. I have an idea, but I'm really not sure." I shrugged. I walked over towards Alice and slowly followed her inside. I wasn't sure why but I felt comforted by her presence. The thought of an entire coven of vampires against me was a scary one but seemed less intense with her near me. I looked towards Jasper and saw him smiling towards me but didn't feel anything coming from him. It must just be Alice. As we approached their family room I slowed, suddenly more nervous than before. I felt a cool arm slide around my back and edge me forward gently. The smell of honey suckle and a bit of mint hit me and instantly I felt warm inside. I glanced to my left where Alice had taken her spot beside me and was guiding me in to meet her 'mother and father'. My skin felt stiff where her arm touched me but it no longer felt cool and wasn't uncomfortable.

"Carlisle, Esme this is Isabella Swan. Bella, this is my 'mother and father'." She smiled as I stepped forward and shook Carlisle's hand. I was a bit taken aback when Esme leaned in for a hug rather than the handshake.

"Welcome into our home, Isabelle." Esme greeted me and kept eye contact with me as she said my name. I didn't have a chance to respond before Carlisle spoke over her shoulder, "Or would you rather us call you Drifter?"


	6. Ch 5 Isabelle, Drifter, Isabella who?

**Ch. 5 Isabelle, Drifter, Isabella, who?**

"How did you..." I stopped short but was staring intently at Esme. It didn't phase me that Carlisle had called me Drifter...after all I had told the local authorities here that was my name at first. Esme however, knew my true name. It was only after several years of hiding and wondering about that I decided a slight change in my true name was in order if I was to keep myself out of the numerous looming questions about who I was and where I was from. Isabelle Marionette Swan became Isabella Marie Swan the great granddaughter of Charlie and Renee Swan-upstanding citizens of Forks with a slightly tainted reputation despite their excellent community involvement.

Esme sighed and tucked a stray hair behind my ear as she sat on the couch in front of me. I followed her lead and sat across from her on the love seat. Alice was quickly at my side. "Isabelle... there are lots of questions we each have for each other. This is your quest to find yourself, so it's only fair you should ask of us what you think you need to know." She spoke softly. She spoke the voice of a mother trying to soothe her child.

My mind was a whirl of questions...thoughts...feelings. Obviously they had been around for sometime...but to know of me...to know my true identity...that could only mean they knew my parents. "My mother?" I couldn't form a complete sentence but seeing Esme's sad smile I knew she understood what I was asking.

"Renee Swan was a beautiful woman I had the luck to run into years and years ago. It wasn't long after I myself was changed. You were a blossoming young girl of 14 I believe." She watched my eyes as if looking to see if any recognition flickered in them. I sat unmoving so she continued. "She was in the company of a man named Demitrius when I met her." She lowered her head. "You see, shortly after Carlisle changed me to save my life...I went into sort of a denial. I am saddened to say I embraced my inner demon and took off, feeding on humans." The remorse on her face was genuine and Carlisle placed a hand softly on his wife's shoulder. "I didn't want to turn my back on my hunger...it was so overpowering and I felt Carlisle an enemy for trying to keep me from the sated feeling a humans blood could bring. I was only gone about a week before he found me, but not before I had killed 5 humans. Your mother was almost one of them."

My eyes widened and I lowered my gaze to the floor. Before I had a chance to say anything she continued.

"Demitrius had a knack for tracking...and sensing our kind. Knowing your mother at the time he felt a danger to her, and stopped me before I had a chance to attack. After calming me down he explained to me about his control over his thirst and my little knowledge of the new life I was living. That was when Carlisle caught up to me. I was able to reign myself in long enough to apologize to your mother before we took our leave. Heading out of Forks I caught scent of your mother again. At least, I thought I had. As we ran through the vast open fields and over a creek bed Carlisle stopped me before we came upon the humans I had smelt. It was you, and another young woman. Elizabeth was her name."

I shuddered as another memory took hold.

"_There is no way for us, is there Isabelle?" Elizabeth trailed her fingers lightly over my hand that was resting next to hers. Her voice was soft and twinged with sadness._

"_No, I don't believe there is. You are to be married next month...and I, well...father knows I do not wish to be forced into a relationship with a man I do not love. He can't keep me safe forever. I will end up betrothed to Harry Clearwater. They think it will help the relations between our families." I sighed, Harry was a nice young man but I did not love him. I could not. "I can not disappoint him."_

"_We will stay friends won't we? We will always have that. And this place." She smiled softly looking around our meadow. I too glanced around, seeing a patch of strawberries blooming a few feet away._

"_Yes, we will always have this place. I only hope that is enough."_

I gripped my stomach as a fierce pain shot through my mid-section. "Bella, are you alright?" It was Alice's beautiful voice that was pulling me out of my mind and back into the present. "Should I call her Isabelle?" She murmured softly to Esme. I could hear the worry in her tone.

"No." I replied as I breathed deeply and sat myself up. "I am Bella now...Isabelle is still a part of me but I fear she died long ago."

Esme shook her head softly, "No. She may be lost...confused and uncertain, but she is very much still alive in you. You only have to find her...to find yourself."

I wished I could agree with that. As I searched my mind for another question to ask her about my mother I was shocked to feel a slight probing in my head. I felt so weak and quickly jerked my head up to make eye contact with Edward. "Would you **please** get out of my head!" All his families' eyes turned towards him and I thought I heard a slight growl coming from Alice.

"You were in love with her." He stated. Thanks, let's just open my insides up for the world to see.

I lowered my head. "We were in love, yes. Think what you will of me but you do not know me so do not make assumptions or judgements about my life."

Alice placed her hand softly on my shoulder and Esme reached for my hand. "Of course we won't. It is not our place and who you love should never be point of a speculation." Esme said and glared at Edward. "Whatever you heard in her mind is not your concern Edward and of all things it shouldn't be an issue whether it was a female or not."

"I meant no disrespect, I'm simply trying to understand. I actually didn't expect to hear anything...the last couple weeks there have been no walls built in her mind but I still haven't heard anything until now." He lowered his eyes slightly, "I'm sorry, Bella."

"It's fine. I suppose..." I stopped glancing around at the 7 faces looking at me intently. "Actually I feel a little nervous with all of you here. Would it be offensive for me to ask to just speak with a couple of you?" I looked at Esme when I spoke.

"Of course not dear." She glanced around at her 'children' and nodded to them. On cue and without question Emmett, Rosalie, Edward and Jasper all stood up and exited the room. Alice hesitated and then squeezed my shoulder gently before standing. I reached out and caught her cool hand.

"Could you stay, Alice?" I requested softly. She looked towards Esme and Carlisle who smiled back at her before turning her attention back to me. "I don't know why but I feel more at ease when you are near." I blushed slightly lowering my head.

"Of course Bella," she smiled and sat back down beside me.

I cleared my throat slightly and began the nervous habit of picking at my nails. "I suppose I should start explaining myself...tell you my story before I can hope for you to be able to help me understand. This won't be easy for me...in all these years I have learned a great deal, and have many ideas as to how and why but nothing is for certain. That's why I need your help."

Esme stood quickly, "I'm going to make you some tea Isabelle and then we can begin. We will help you anyway we can." She smiled and hurried off towards their kitchen.

"It'll be okay Bella." Alice whispered softly and gently grabbed my hand.

I looked at her entwined fingers and felt a shift of impossible warmth flow through me from my new friend.

I was beginning to wonder if I was opening up more mysteries and questions rather than getting the answers I seek.


	7. Ch 6 The Monster in Me

**Ch. 6 The Monster in Me**

I stood up and began a slow pacing back and forth twisting my hands together nervously. "I'm not quite sure how to go about this, so I suppose I will just start at the beginning." I looked to each of them and after an encouraging smile and nod from each I continued.

"I was born May 17, 1907 right here in Forks to Charlie and Renee Swan. My birth name is Isabelle Marionette Swan. Growing up I always felt a little out of place, as if something about me was different from others, from my family. I had no idea what or why but it was always just a feeling. As a child, I had dreams...I quickly learned to keep them to myself when my family thought me crazy and I feared being sent away with the crazy folks. I had dreams of...the future I suppose you could say. I eventually learned to ignore them, and they went away. But since I can remember I've had one that does not leave me...I'll get to that at another time."

I took a deep breath, "My family...while considered upstanding citizens and held in great regard...was not as wonderful as people thought. My mother was for lack of a better word, promiscuous. There were rumours every so often that she wasn't faithful to my father but most people passed it off as jealousy over their loving relationship. They weren't all rumours. I dreamed she was unfaithful to my father but he forgave her. I only told him the once...I didn't want to hurt him. However, I heard them argue one night, the night my father wasn't sure that I was even his. Looking at me it should leave little doubt however. I look a lot like him."

I made my way back over towards the loveseat and sat back down next to Alice. "Obviously we know I'm not quite human...but I don't know what I am or why I am like this. I was born of a human woman but I can only assume one of my mother's infidelities helped make me the way I am."

"Other than you not aging, are there any other abilities or signs to help us figure this out?" Carlisle asked. He almost seemed excited about the idea of a puzzle to figure out.

"I think maybe it best if I show you." I reached forward and grabbed the vase from the center of the table. Alice, who had been staring off for a bit suddenly grabbed the vase from my hand.

"No Bella, don't try to hurt yourself." Her eyes seemed panicked. I knew she had seen me break the vase but she must have brought herself out of her vision before she saw its completion.

I smiled at her softly, staring at her golden eyes trying to convey my reassurances to her. "Trust me." I whispered to her and grabbed the vase and broke it against the table's edge. Using the broken vase I jabbed it into my left forearm only to have the remaining piece of glass shatter against me. "Now you see."

They all stared at me in wonder...not understanding what they were seeing. "Were you turned?" Esme sputtered trying to make sense of it.

"No. I have never been bitten by a vampire...nor have I ever had any other accident other than a few careless stumbles of my own accord that resulted in a scratch or two." I looked down to my healed palms remembering the last time close to a month ago now.

"Scratches? But how?" This time it was Alice that spoke.

"This may sound crazy but given the world we live in, the countless things I'm sure we all have seen and experienced, try to have an open mind." I again stood up and resumed my pacing. "The only conclusion I can come up with is that my mother, near the time of my conception was not only with my father, but had also been with a vampire." I turned looking at their faces. They seemed sceptical yet something was causing them not to speak out and deny the possibility.

"The easiest way to explain this is just to say it. Ever since...I was 17 I noticed the pattern. Something happened that triggered it and it makes no sense and I can't figure it out...but since...the event happened I seem to be almost like a chameleon. I was born human...or at least close to one. When I happen to be around vampires I tend to take on their traits. I end up being unable to be harmed, my skin gets harder and cooler to the touch. I stop aging. Should I be around humans and not around vampires as much, I begin to age again and I become vulnerable just like any human." I stopped my pacing and turned to face them.

Carlisle stood and walked towards me. "What you're saying...I can honestly say I have never dreamed it possible; that a vampire could not only have the strength to mate with a human and not kill them, but to father a child as well. But given your unique situation it's the only thing that makes sense. What about your appetite?"

"I expected this question. I had been with vampires off and on for the last 85 years. In that time I learned that if I stayed near them for too long I started to feel the burn in my throat, the longing for blood. I was able to feel it coming and leave for a time. It has allowed me to keep my human side in- tact and not kill as well as keep me from aging so that I could keep searching for any clues to figure out my life...and what happened to my mother. I am actually physically closer to 19 years old. There were a few times the thirst got too much and I stayed away longer...my body aged. Since then I have been able to balance it carefully." I scratched the back of my neck and sighed. "Coming back to this town could prove helpful to me, but it could prove deadly not only for humans but to you as well."

"Bella, how is that so? You seem in control of yourself and if you think being around us will cause you to become more like us you can stop it and leave..." Alice began but I was shaking my head.

"That's not the problem. The true problem, the one that plagues my nightmares I haven't discussed with you yet. This is the one...that could cause you to contemplate destroying me yourselves. I'm putting a lot on the line telling you what I am about to." I bit my lip and looked directly at Alice. "I don't know why I feel this connection to you Alice, but despite being a good feeling in my heart, I fear it could end up hurting you and that is something I do not want."

"I'm afraid we don't understand Bella, please...what aren't you telling us?" Carlisle asked, leading me back to sit beside Alice as he returned to his spot at Esme's side.

"Elizabeth Hadden, the girl you saw me with Esme...was my truest friend. Yes, we were in love. Sadly that love never went further than our 16th birthdays. Almost a year to that day I fled Forks scared beyond belief." I was wringing my hands harder now and put my head in my hands. Alice stroked my back softly, the warm tingling leaving a path where her hand touched me.

"Go on Bella, what happened sweetie?" Alice asked. I looked up and searched her eyes. Giving in to faith that they would not abandon me I gave in to my deepest darkest secret.

"I killed her."


	8. Ch 7 You Always Hurt the One You Love

_**Terribly sorry it has been SO stupidly long for this update. Life has been…life :P I do plan to finish it so please hang in there! And re-read if you feel you need to. I know I had to and I'm writing it! I apologize as well that this is a VERY short update but I wanted to get you something as I continue on the next couple. Thanks so much for your patience!! ~~~Nick**_

**Ch. 7 You always hurt the ones you love- or in my case, kill.**

* * *

The room was silent and I lowered my eyes to the carpet. I felt my jaw clench and didn't dare look up into their eyes. Perhaps a minute passed before Esme spoke, "Bella…"

I took a slow deliberate breath and swallowed hard, "I killed her. My first love and my only friend…died by my" I swallowed the lump in my throat before getting the word out… "hands." I stood up again and walked to their window looking out at the moon. I didn't realize how dark it had gotten. "If it's possible, worse than knowing I had taken her life…was the look in her eyes as she died beneath my body. Her eyes…" I turned and made eye contact with Alice for the first time since my confession. Her eyes held a compassion and pain in them as she stared back at me. "Her eyes held no blame, no hatred. Even as she took her last breath she looked at me with the purest love. I am a monster you see…she should have seen that. But she did not."

I braced my hands on the ledge and lowered my head slightly as the memory slammed into me full force. My arms strained as I tried to force it back…I couldn't relive it now. I couldn't face the pain…not now.

"Bella," Alice whispered and gently placed her hand on my shoulder. I hadn't realized she had stood and followed me the few steps to the window.

My body started to tense but suddenly relaxed and I lowered my head. I turned to face her and cupped her cheek. "Your eyes are the window to your soul…and hers showed me everything I want yet everything I fear." I took a slight breath and gave her a sad smile as we made our way back to the loveseat. As Alice sat back down I kept my stance and looked at each of them intently, "Do you see the monster in my eyes? Because not one but three make its home within me."

"Oh Gods," Alice whispered as her golden eyes bore into mine. Esme and Carlisle looked at me as if they were trying to see what Alice saw before glancing back to their daughter hopeful for clarification. "She phased."

* * *

**_Sorry again for the short update...more coming soon!!!_**


	9. Ch 8 True Definition of

**Hope you all enjoy!**

**

* * *

  
**

**Ch. 8 True Definition of 'Bastard' Child**

**

* * *

  
**

"Bella…" Carlisle seemed a loss for words, "Alice? Please, help us understand what you mean. She phased?"

Esme stood and slowly approached me, "Surely there's some mistake…it was an accident Bella…" she sputtered trying to make sense of what Alice had so clearly seen.

Carlisle stood and looked between me and Alice, "Alice, you didn't have a vision." He stated more than asked, "And if it were you only see the future…this was 85 years ago."

I cleared my throat and shoved my hands into the pockets of my jeans. "I phased. I was just mere inches," I stepped closer to Alice who was now standing in front of the couch, "just inches away from her when I exploded into a giant bole coloured wolf." Alice's eyes never left mine and she didn't budge an inch despite being in such a close proximity to me after what I had told them. "So you see, I'm not human…I'm the very definition of a bastard child." I smirked and shook my head. "But why?"

Alice grabbed my hand and held it in her own and squeezed softly. Her hands didn't feel cool to me at all. I smiled at her furrowed brow. "Already?" She whispered and I nodded.

"It's not near as gradual as it used to be. I've been here a few weeks, in classes with you and your siblings," turning to Carlisle and Esme, "your children, and already I have become more vampire than human. My skin is already hardened and I don't feel warm to you as I would have when I first got here."

"So short times exposed to our kind…over a couple weeks and you begin changing…the longer the exposure," Carlisle hesitated, "do you think it would become permanent and that you would house all of our abilities as well as weaknesses?"

"I haven't a clue about the permanence but the abilities and weaknesses yes. Already my speed, reflexes, sense of smell and sight have improved ten-fold. It's never been this sudden, but I'm thinking that is attributed to the size of your coven as well as daily exposure."

"Edward can read you as a human…when you aren't blocking him with your brick building," Alice smirked at me, "but now that you're becoming more like us, he can't. Are you trying?"

I shook my head. "I haven't actually had to try the last week and a half. The only thing I can think is that as a human, he can read me if I'm open. As I change, the ability to block is no longer a chore its subconscious…a defensive mechanism that the vampire part of me triggers."

"Isabelle would you mind if I document this…your past, your present and everything we learn and find out? I find this quite fascinating…" off my slightly pained look he back tracked, "I mean no disrespect, we will help you in any way that we can, I just have never seen nor heard of anything like this in my nearly 400 years and well…" he would have blushed if it were possible, "I love a mystery to solve."

I nodded my head, "Of course, I've had no luck the last 85 years on my own. Whatever you think may help I am open to."

"Could I speak openly for a moment? I don't wish to make anyone uncomfortable but if we are trying to figure this out I don't want to speculate unless it's out loud." Esme spoke softly looking between me and Alice. Off my nod and smile she continued, "There's something you aren't telling us…something you don't understand but are afraid what it might mean." She stopped, "I'm saying this all wrong…I just think that there is something between you and our Alice," she smiled softly as she took Alice's hand in her own, "And that something could open up a whole new book of questions but could also answer much if it is explored."

I may have been turning more into a vampire than a human but there was still blood in my veins and my heart was still beating so I noticed the way every eye turned to me when my heart sped up and the blood flushed in my cheeks. "You aren't wrong, Esme." I bit my lip slightly and glanced just briefly at Alice to see a somewhat shocked yet expectant curious look on her face. "You see, since I met Alice I have felt a pull towards her. I can't explain that. I haven't had that happen to me at all since that night."

"You felt the pull with Elizabeth…the pull of love?" Esme prodded gently.

"More than that…it wasn't just her I felt pulling at my entire being that night. The pull from her was our love, yes, but the pull that came after was controlling. Or it was trying to be. The voices were so dominate it was as if I were being screamed at from a distance yet inside me all at the same time." I scrunched my eyebrows and scratched my head. "There were so many…"

"The pack mind." Carlisle said simply and I looked to him expectantly. He seemed shocked "The werewolves that were in La Push back in that time…when you phased Bella they became aware. They were calling to you and you felt the pull their Alpha must have had on you as a new werewolf. You weren't aware of that?"

I shook my head as my thoughts whirled out of control, "I thought I was being hunted, chased…that someone had seen…" I began pacing again before becoming completely still, "when I phased they could hear me as clearly as I could hear them?" Carlisle nodded, "Oh dear lord they had to have known what I had done!"

"I'm sure they did but they wanted to help you. You can't be blamed for what happened Bella. There's no way you could have known what was happening to you. I am curious…what caused the change? Had their been a full moon?" Carlisle asked and I knew there was more to his question.

"It was the first night…not completely full no. I…" I shrugged, "We had an argument. She was to be married and though neither of us wanted it, she was trying to convince me that I would find someone better suited…that she would always love me but we couldn't make it work once she was wed. I was so hurt…angry and before I could even speak she was lying beneath me and I was covered in her blood. I knew I hadn't hurt her but there was no other explanation."

Alice shook her head and cupped my cheek, "You didn't hurt her on purpose. You didn't attack her Bella. The phasing is such a sudden and violent changing of your body that anything too close…" She didn't finish her sentence and I felt her swipe her thumb across my cheek, "these still work." She whispered sadly.

I snorted slightly and sniffled, "I'm sorry I must look a mess."

"You look beautiful." Alice smiled and pulled me into a tight embrace. I melted into her warm arms. I laughed in my head at the thought of a vampire being warm but she was. I only hoped I didn't hurt her or her family the way I had Elizabeth. I couldn't stand to hurt her even though I had only known her a few weeks. "You won't." She whispered and I straightened out of the hug and looked at her with wide eyes.

"What?" I turned to look behind me and it was apparent Carlisle and Esme were as confused as I was. "What did you say?"

Alice furrowed her brow and tilted her head slightly to look at me, "I said you won't. You said you couldn't stand it if you hurt me or my family."

I shook my head trying to understand. I didn't speak out loud, did I?

"Alice," Carlisle began before Esme cut him off, "Alice Bella didn't say anything."

Alice laughed and looked between all of us, "Okay you guys I am not crazy." She looked at me again and back at her 'parents', "Am I?"

"You…you heard me. You heard my thoughts." I barely got out, confused at this new turn.

"Edward hears thoughts, I see the future. You really didn't say that out loud?" She asked for clarification.

I shook my head and Carlisle spoke, "Is it possible you had a vision of Bella saying that to you, Alice?"

"You know my visions don't work that way…I would have zoned out at least somewhat and I didn't go anywhere. I swear I heard her whisper that to me." She turned and looked at me, never dropping our laced fingers, "what are we, Isabella?"

I swallowed hard and bit my lip, "I don't know Alice, but despite my messed up life you don't have to be anything but a friend, if you wish to be that." I reassured her and gave her hands a squeeze. "I hate to cut this short but I should probably get back before Karen gets worried."

"Bella before you go, I do have one final question." Carlisle stepped forward, following Alice and I to the door. "Have you phased much since that night?"

"Not once. But then, I hadn't been exposed to any werewolves. Well, at least not that I know of." I grabbed my jacket that Alice had retrieved for me and put it over my arm. I wasn't feeling cold anymore lately. "Thank you and if you have anymore questions or any information you think might help me out, at least to find out what happened to my mother please, call me?"

"Of course Bella" Esme whispered, "Please let Alice drive you home at least?"

"I don't want to be a bother, it's not like anything can hurt me right now anyway." I smiled and opened the right side of the large double doors.

"Please? I really don't mind. And there are werewolves in La Push. We have a boundary line but it would make me feel better." Alice begged and waved her keys.

What could I do but nod and smile. I wished Carlisle and Esme a good night and headed out into the darkness with the magnetic pulling pixie at my side.

* * *


	10. Ch 9 Reassurance Rock

**Thank you all for the generous feedback you have left me. It means a lot and is a great motivator. I hope you enjoy this next chapter but as always, please let me know what you think!**

**

* * *

**

**Ch. 9 Reassurance Rock**

**

* * *

**

"So there are how many werewolves in La Push?" I asked bewildered. Two weeks had gone by since my confession. We hadn't figured out much more but the Cullen's were helping with any sources they could for information about my mother and hopefully me. "And my friend Angela…her boyfriend Jacob is one? Does she know this?"

"We aren't sure on the exact number but at least four. And yes, I believe your friend would know, especially if he has imprinted on her which seems likely given their close nature. Obviously they aren't aware of your…uniqueness." Carlisle walked around his desk and sat on the edge looking at me sincerely, "As you now know of our treaty with the Quileutes we do help each other out from time to time with a rogue vampire but we stay very strict on our boundaries and rules. We only wish to live in peace with them."

"And you're positive they aren't the same men…" I trailed off as I knew Carlisle understood my questions. They weren't the same men that had chased after me and had known what I had done that fateful night I left Forks. "Imprinted?" I asked suddenly not understanding the term.

"Not the same, no. But as each generation of wolves arise, the memories of the past are passed down to the sons. So they would know of your history here. It's possible they already do if any of them have seen you about. And to answer your second question, the werewolves do what is called imprinting on their future mates; or soulmates if you will. For humans you might see it as a love at first sight or just…a trigger. The wolves feel that intense heat in a slightly different manner but it effectively binds the two together. Therefore there would be no secrets between them." He studied me, waiting for my reaction. I kept still, soaking it all in. "She cares about you, you know." He stated simply.

"Who?" I asked although I had a pretty good idea of whom he was referring to. _Alice_.

"Alice." He smiled sincerely, "I know you two have become good friends and of course she is trying to help you as much as she can with her own gift but more than that…she seems happier."

I stared at him for a moment, almost feeling child like in the face of my best friends' father, "I too am happier. I just hope she doesn't think odd of me…of the situation. I'm sure making a new friend is great she seems very people oriented," I smiled thinking of the bubbly young woman, "but it has to be…strange knowing that I feel something towards her, perhaps even to make her uncomfortable or feel forced into a friendship she may or may not have wanted."

Carlisle tilted his head slightly, "Does she seem uncomfortable around you or like fate is dealing her a hand she didn't ask for?"

I thought sincerely about his question. Alice had never seemed put off or acted any different around me. In fact, we had spoken about what I had confided to them during our first meeting. The pull I felt. Alice had admitted that she too felt it towards me. Surely if it was something she wanted nothing to do with or felt obligated with she would say so and distance herself from me. Right? "No, she doesn't."

Carlisle stood and glanced at the door briefly before smiling and clasping his hands. I too glanced briefly as I heard soft footsteps approaching. "Rest assured Bella; Alice is very strong willed and strong minded. She won't do anything she doesn't want to do."

I nodded and smiled back as Alice peeked her head inside after knocking softly. "Sorry to interrupt but Karen called asking if you would be home for dinner. I hope you don't mind, Bella, but I asked her if you could spend the weekend with me." She bit her lip slightly, "I told her I was making you go shopping with me!"

I couldn't help but laugh and nod my head, "That's fine Alice, but do you really plan to make me shop?"

She smiled brightly and her laugh sounded like soft musical bells drifting around me. I was quickly falling in love with the soft tinkling laugh that so often fell from her lips.

Alice's smile beamed as her eyes widened slightly and she cast a quick glance to Carlisle. I looked back to the doctor only to see him looking at Alice curiously. "Alice?" He asked as she turned back to me shaking her head.

"Nothing sorry, uh, no we don't have to. I just thought that maybe being here we could do some more brain-storming and have some best friend time if that's alright with you." She uncharacteristically cleared her throat and seemed a bit nervous.

"Of course. I'd love to spend the weekend with you." I smiled at her upon seeing her face light up at my response. _Oh Alice, whatever are you doing to me?_ I thought as my heart picked up it's pace seeing the light shine in her golden eyes. Looking at her she seemed to almost smirk at me with a look of understanding.

"Come on Bella, I think we have lots to talk about. See you later Carlisle." She called out as she grabbed my hand and we made our way to the open office window.

Did I mention we were on the second floor? "Alice?"

"Oh come on Bella," she giggled and tapped on my hardened skin, "Live a little." She laughed out loud before stepping off the ledge with me right next to her. After 85 years of drifting by how could I argue with that?

We ran to where should have taken us a few hours by car in less than twenty minutes. The speed was exhilarating as we ran, hand in hand through the trees, jumping over creeks and laughing all the while. We finally slowed once we reached a small cliff over-looking the ocean. The waves crashing upon the rocks were beautiful and the evening was quiet and still. It was easy to tell this was a place Alice must come to often as there were no trails or camp areas in sight for humans. "Thinking rock?" I asked as we sat down on a small rock ledge where we could slightly feel the mist of the ocean as it crashed below us.

"Yeah." She smiled and pulled me down to sit beside her, "I come here quite often to think, try to force a vision, or just to be. There's no brother prodding into my head, no one trying to settle my emotions if they are worried, scared or angry. I'm just me here."

I smiled and nodded in understanding. "That's what the strawberry patch meadow was for me and Elizabeth." I whispered softly, looking just out from under the vale of my hair. "Alice can I ask you something and answer me honestly please?"

"Of course, Bella. I don't feel that I could ever lie to you, even if I had to." She answered and turned slightly to show I had her full attention.

I licked my lips and took a slow deep breath, "When I compare certain things in my past…with Elizabeth to now, in relation to you or our friendship, does it bother you in any way at all?"

Alice was quiet for a moment before speaking, "No. If you want me to be completely honest, I'd have to say it makes me feel like I've never felt before…and it scares me."

She raised her finger to my lips to silence me before I had a chance to ask her what she meant and continued, "Bella, I had visions of a lost young woman coming to Forks. My family would befriend her and help her on her journey to find herself. I never actually _saw_ you; or rather I never saw your face. But I know in my heart it was you. I know you worry that what you feel…what we feel will be questioned by if it's our choice or something forcing our hands but don't. As Carlisle said I won't do or be anything to anyone that I don't want to be, and I know you wouldn't either."

I nodded and smiled softly, "And it scares you?" I asked as I played with her pinkie finger.

She laced her fingers with mine before speaking, "It scares me, because despite knowing how great we could and would be together…" my breath hitched at her words, "I know you're still in pain over Elizabeth and I would never dream of trying to replace her in your heart."

"She will always be there and no one could take her place." I replied truthfully and Alice nodded her head, "However, I have a big heart and a lot of space in it that needs filling," I whispered. "Do you have room for me too?"

Alice's eyes shined with unshed tears, "More than you can imagine." She squeezed my hand softly as I leaned towards her cupping her snow white cheek. "Isabella," she whispered as our lips met in a tentative and soft kiss. Despite both of our bodies cool temperatures our lips felt like fire pressed together. We didn't deepen it, just simply allowed our lips to dance across each other before pulling back slowly.

Resting my forehead against hers I smiled and leaned back just far enough to look into her darkened golden eyes, "Bet you didn't see that one coming did you Seer?"

She smirked at me and pulled me closer by the back of my neck, "No but I'm anticipating this one, Drifter," she grinned and captured my willing lips once again.

I may not yet have found out any meaning to my existence in this world, but with Alice Cullen at my side I was ready to make a place for myself in it.

* * *


	11. Ch 10 Skin of Ice Fire Burning Within

**Thank you all for the generous feedback you have left me. I am terribly sorry for the lack of updates this past month. As one loyal reader pointed out I am a bit lazy! ****And no, I didn't take it as a bad thing. She was right in that it was a combo of laziness and real life! So this is for you Isha. Enjoy!!!**

**--**

**Ch. 10 Skin of Ice with a Fire Burning Within**

The last two weeks have been relatively normal. I snorted at myself. Defining my very existence as normal seemed idiotic.

The Cullen's had been reaching out to any and every contact they had trying to find out what happened with my mother and the vampire Demitrie she had been with all those years ago. For all we knew, he was 1/3 of my father material. Sometimes I feel like I should be on that Jerry Springer talk show Jessica is always rambling about at lunch. I could see it now, `_Yes that's right, I`m here today to find out what other two men are my fathers._ ` Maybe the paternity test thing was Maury. Regardless, I would have to say my life is seriously talk show material.

"What are you thinking about?" Alice asked softly. I was surprised she hadn't heard that, then again she only seemed to hear it when it was directly about or to her.

We were sitting at the Cullen lunch table. I liked to split my time between my vampire friends and my human friends. On the days I sat with Angela and the other humans Alice would sit with me. Everyone was starting to warm up to her, and how could they not? I smiled in thought looking at the stunning woman beside me. "You." I answered honestly and smiled when she ducked her head shyly. The entire table gave a round of 'Awwws' and I couldn't help but chuckle. For the first time in nearly 85 years I felt truly happy again. Every one of the Cullen's had been very receptive to me as well as to the growing bond between Alice and I. No one spoke openly about it so much as just slight nods and smirks so I knew they would be supportive regardless of which way our lives took us.

I happened to glance up at that moment when I heard my name. Angela was responding to a question from Jessica asking if Alice and I were a couple. Angela was eyeing me curiously and turned away when she noticed I was paying attention. Of course, she couldn't know I could hear her, could she? Then again, her boyfriend is a werewolf, so it's possible they had no secrets from each other, which meant she knew what the Cullen's were. And then it dawned on me, she might know what I am too. Or enough. I swallowed and looked away but not before I heard Angela's reply, "I'm not sure but it certainly appears so."

Rosalie growled too quietly for any human to hear, but nailed Jessica in her spot with a death glare. I too heard Jessica's, 'oh...ew' comment but chose to ignore it. Some people will never grow up. I'm certainly glad Rose and I hit it off. I would never want to be on her bad side. "No you sure wouldn't." Alice replied and smirked at Rose who looked at her curiously. Everyone looked at Alice with a raised eyebrow, "Okay we really have to figure this out. I feel like Edward only wondering if I'm answering your thoughts or your actual words." Alice feigned being irritated which only made her look cuter. "Thank you." She turned her attention back to me and let out an exasperated sigh. "I did it again didn't I? I swear unless I see your lips move I'll never know for sure." She paused and laced her fingers with mine under the table, "Not that I mind that..." she trailed off.

"You two are just adorable." Emmett grinned, wrapping his arm around Rose. "I have to admit, I'm kinda jealous. It would be awesome to have like a private walkie talkie here with Rose." He squeezed her shoulder for emphasis. "Well, except from Edward I guess."

"Now that Bella is more vampire than human," Edward started in a voice only our table could hear, "I haven't been able to hear her. However I can still hear every thought in everyone else's mind. Except Alice's." We all looked at him confused. "I mean, I can still hear you Alice, but anytime Bella thinks something only for you, I don't hear it even as it enters your mind. It's like her thoughts are encrypted even once they are in your head."

"Wow, so it may be one sided but we can have a private conversation without you butting in or an accidental eaves drop." Alice clarified. She smirked and I smiled back at her.

"Yeah me too. Could come in very handy." Everyone looked at me like I had a second head. Including Alice. I stared into her eyes concentrating on my thoughts. _You can still hear me, right? Try responding only with your mind. Don't speak._

_Oh my god, Bella. Loud and clear, if I wasn't looking right at you, your lips...I would swear you were talking right into my ear._ Our entwined fingers tightened.

It took Jasper and Edward clearing their throats to get our attention. Normally the first ones out of the cafeteria when the bell rang, we were now the last. "I think it's best if we all go directly home and speak to Carlisle after school." Jasper said.

We all nodded and headed towards one of our last three classes of the day. _This keeps getting stranger and stranger._

_Tell me about it._ I smirked towards Alice hearing her thoughts just as she had heard mine. Clasping her hand I escorted her to our next class. Despite the enhanced senses vampires possess, I was completely unaware of the set of eyes that watched us and then headed out the cafeteria door towards the parking lot.

~_~_~_~

"Interesting...very interesting." Carlisle paced his office before coming to sit on the corner of his desk. "So now you can both speak to each other telepathically." He stated rather than asked. "While there are many talents vampires possess this one I have only heard of in a few rare cases. Only two of the three were vampires."

"What happened in those cases and who was the third pair? Human...or werewolf?" I asked as Esme came in with a glass of lemonade for me. I smiled and took it taking a small drink. I hadn't said anything to them but I had been eating and drinking a lot less and was beginning to feel a burn in my throat. The thirst was returning. I'd have to talk to Alice about it later. I only felt comfortable confiding in her about this first...and maybe she would take me hunting. _You know I will._ She thought to me and squeezed my hand. I smiled in return and focused my attention back to Carlisle.

"The first two yes are vampires. One pair of mates live with the Amazonian vampires. They too are both female." He smiled lovingly between us and Esme. The second pair are actually Volturi guard members. You've met them once before Alice. Caius and Felix. Again, a same sex couple."

"And the last, the ones that aren't vampires?" Alice asked before I had a chance to ask the question myself. "What about them?"

"They are indeed werewolves. Two members of our Quileute pack in fact." He sighed and stood up. "I owe you two an apology. This isn't information I've just recently come by. I wanted to wait, to test and see if yours too would develop as the others had. They all began one sided and came full circle. The vampires a bit differently than the werewolves but still the same end result."

"Why didn't you tell us, why did you want to wait?" I asked, still confused as to what this meant, if anything.

Carlisle rubbed his forehead slightly and looked down briefly. "The reason was mostly my curiousness as to how it would turn out, and for that I am sorry. Allow me to better explain what I know, then you can ask any questions you need and I will answer to the best of my ability." Seeing our nod of consent, he continued. "I first learned of Caius and Felix during my short stay with the Volturi when I was very young. It wasn't uncommon then for two men to be together but what was uncommon was that at the time, Felix was human. Felix could hear the thoughts Caius thought to him, but couldn't respond in kind until after he was changed. You see, Caius changed Felix in order for them to have eternity together. It was then the ability came full circle. The same thing happened with Kachiri and Zafrina. Zafrina changed Kachiri to be her mate, and then Kachiri too could pass her thoughts on to Zafrina telepathically."

"So in both instances this gift wasn't brought forth until the other mate was changed..." I started thinking rapidly now. "It was as if it was the bonding...the changing from human to vampire for the sake of eternal love bonded them in such a way they were able to link their minds as one." It was a statement but just as much as a question in my mind. "So then with us, how?" I stopped, confused again, "is it because I'm turning into a vampire?"

Carlisle shook his head, "I don't believe it is, Bella. I think..." He hesitated as if trying to figure out how to word what he wanted to say. _Imprinting..._

"What?" I turned to look at Alice as I heard the thought enter her mind. "Oh. OH! I...I didn't mean to, I..." I was rambling and glanced around the room quickly before landing my eyes back on Alice's. _I didn't know I could...I didn't want to take the choice away from you._ I thought to her, a wave of sadness swept through me thinking I could have taken away her chance to choose and to fall in love with whoever she wanted.

_You didn't, so stop thinking that way. You are who I've chosen, Bella._ Alice stared at me intently before turning back to her father and mother. "So because she's imprinted on me and chosen me as her mate, I can now pass my thoughts back to her?"

Esme smiled and lit up the room. "Oh my girls...this is terrific news!" She beamed and I blushed slightly with what little part of humanity was still able to blush.

Carlisle laughed softly before answering Alice, "I think it's more than that. A huge part yes, of course, but I think perhaps it was not only the imprinting, but Bella's choice to stay with you, regardless of what the end result to her physically would be. Isn't that right, Bella?"

Alice looked to me with a slight frown. "What's he talking about?" _What aren't you telling me?_

I licked my lips and cupped her cheek. "I talked with Carlisle while you were out hunting last week...about my transformation becoming permanent. We still aren't sure where it stands, but I confided in him that regardless of whether or not it would be permanent, me being a vampire that is, that I would take it happily if it meant I got to spend eternity with you." _My only fear is that if it isn't permanent...I don't want to age and leave you. Therefore I was discussing my options...if I could be turned given my heritage and what I am._ I lowered my eyes briefly.

"Oh Bella..." Alice enveloped me in a bone crushing hug and I relaxed into her, hugging her back just as tightly. _We'll figure it out, we will. _

"I know." I smiled warmly. Looking to her parents I couldn't help but smirk at their loving smiles. You would think they had just won the lottery. "I'm so glad you approve...and thank you, for the information Carlisle. It helps explain quite a lot." It was then that my mind jumped at me that I was forgetting something. "Wait...what about the werewolves?"

"I only know about the pack members due to Edward's mind reading ability. I'm not sure they are aware we know. During one of our last coven/pack meetings Edward took notice of Embry and Quil, two of the more recent members and their train of thoughts. It was then he realized they were a couple. However, as Edward explained to you, he couldn't hear their thoughts when it appeared they were thinking to each other. After he told me that, it all made perfect sense as that's how it was with the vampire mates."

"Do you find it strange that the only cases of this happening have only been with same sex couples?" I asked.

"Strange, no. More uniquely obvious. It's love, pure and untainted. Regardless of gender, race, species. I think it accelerated an already steel tight bond."

"Wow." Alice and I both replied at the same time and both chuckled softly. "Well, thank you again, both of you." I said looking at the two older vampires. "Your entire family has been very welcoming and helpful to me and that is very much appreciated."

"No need to thank us Bella. It's our pleasure." Esme replied and wrapped her arm around her husband.

"Come on Bella, let's go for a run before you have to get back to check in with Karen." Alice grabbed my arm and like each time we leave the house, dropped down from the upstairs window. We took off running holding hands and smiling all the way.

We made our way back to Alice's 'thinking rock' as I had now named it and sat staring out at the ocean. I stretched out and rested my head in her lap as she slowly dragged her fingers through my hair. I closed my eyes, the action calming me. _What are you thinking about, Isabella?_ I smiled knowing she was talking to me without speaking. I could still hear her beautiful musical voice and it made my slow beating heart flutter a bit faster.

_I'm thinking about how nice that feels. I can't believe I've found you...that we're together, here. As I said before, I don't want you to feel pushed into anything and before you argue I know you don't but I can't help but feel some of it is kind of forced upon you. I just hope you know that you can be honest with me, always and I'll never think any less of you. I just want...no I need you in my life Alice. In any way you want to be in it._

Her hand trailed down my face and rested over my heart that was beating slower and slower each day. I opened my eyes and looked into her darkening gold. _I need you in my life as well...in every way. When you're ready. When we are both ready._ She smiled and leaned down to brush her lips softly over mine. I sighed out loud at the sensation. I felt buzzed with her presence. It was then I heard it, a beating heart just past the tree line to our left. _You need to hunt._

I nodded my head and swallowed the burn I was feeling. I knew it was now or never; I couldn't risk hurting a human. It was time to start living the vegetarian vampire lifestyle. I smirked. We both leapt up and took off running towards the woods. I crouched and stopped breathing when I came upon a shaggy elk. He raised his head, sniffing, ears alert at the sense of danger. Before he had a chance to clear the creek bed half a mile further into the woods I let my senses take over and leapt onto him, sinking my teeth into his neck and holding his body to the forest floor as I drank my fill. The blood wasn't sweet but there was something in it I craved. It was rich and it was soothing the burn. The elk stopped twitching as his heart stopped and I let his head and neck drop to the ground. I felt a bit of remorse looking at the corpse but Alice was at my side in an instant with her hand at my lower back. _The guilty feeling will pass Bella._ I nodded and looked into her bright gold eyes. Peering behind her I saw that she too had landed another Elk. I hadn't noticed the second one. I'll have to hone in on my senses better in the future. The thought no more left my head before I sniffed and felt a tremble go through my body.

_Alice...do you smell that?_ I asked when I caught the scent of wolf in the air. Alice had already grabbed my hand and began running us back towards the tree line. _What's wrong? They can't attack us._

_No, they shouldn't but listen, its running fast and we're close to the boundary line. Better safe than sorry. The young ones can be unpredictable._ And we ran...we got back to the edge of the cliff when a voice rang out. "STOP!"

I turned to see a half naked man and a young woman came out of the trees slowly. "A little close to the boundary aren't you leeches?!" He sneered and I could see his body was trembling. He looked to me as I was looking behind him, recognition dawning on me. Angela. This must be Jacob then. He took notice of my look to his mate, "What are you looking at leech, I asked you two a question!"

"We didn't pass the boundary but I am sorry we were too close. We meant no harm." Alice spoke softly yet confidently trying not to anger him. I wondered if he was a young one as well. _Yes_ Alice answered for me.

He looked at me curiously then back to Alice...that's when he swung back to look at Angela when he heard her say my name. "What?" He looked back at me and then glared at Alice. "Did you bite a human?!" He roared and before my eyes the shaking got terribly violent before a russet coloured wolf exploded from his human form and he began charging across the open clearing towards Alice.

"NO!" I screamed and felt myself enveloped into a white hot heat. The surge in my chest was so painful I nearly screamed out in agony before it ended and I placed myself in front of Alice and snarled angrily at the wolf before me. It was then I noticed we were eye to eye and the shock on his face would have been comical for an enormous wolf had the situation been different. _Back away from her now!_ I roared in my head at him.

_How...how is this possible? What are you?_ He yelled at me, confused. It was then his thoughts were flying through his head, and in turn through mine. I was seeing his thoughts, memories, past life memories and I froze when I heard myself growl when he found what he was looking for. After all the sifting through his pack's past memories of the last 100 years in what was only a few seconds he confirmed what had once been known. He saw my former life, the very woman I had once loved and killed as if he were living it himself. _You._ Without another thought he spun on his heels and headed back towards the trees only slowing to allow Angela to climb on his back before they disappeared into the cover of the woods.

My body was still trembling as I replayed the past over and over...fresh in my mind thanks to Jacob's memories of his ancestors. I looked down at my...paws. As I stared at them I swore I saw blood. The red, thick liquid oozing from my fur and as I looked down further I saw Elizabeth beneath them, covered in her own blood looking at me with love and forgiveness as I heard her whisper, 'Isabelle,' before her eyes closed for the last time. I was lost in that memory...no I was there again. It was happening again. I was killing her over and over again in my mind and the agony was too much. My chest wanted to explode and I wanted to let it.

_No...NO Bella, do NOT think like that. Do you hear me? Please Bella, please...look at me!_ It was then I felt it, the constant rubbing of my face, my muzzle, and my ears. I shook my enormous head until I could raise my eyes to hers. _Bella..._

_Alice..._ I whimpered in my mind. My knees went week and I felt all four of my legs buckle under my weight and I collapsed to the cool damp earth. _Alice it hurts...so much._ I pleaded to her. The pain was searing. I felt as if my heart were being ripped out, my insides were burning. It wasn't like the fire burn from before; it was the burning you get when you're so cold you're nearly numb. Freezer-burn was the only term that made sense for how I was feeling.

_Bella...honey concentrate. Please, you have to try and breathe, relax. I need you to for me okay? I need you to phase back. I don't know what's happening but it's hurting you Bella, this isn't right. The vampire part of you...the werewolf, I don't think they can co-exist. Please Bella, I can't lose you..._

I tried to slow my breathing, to lose myself in the sound of her voice, the feel of her cool hands and lips as she rubbed and kissed my face and paws. The tremble was lessening but the burn...the pain. _I'm trying Alice...please don't leave me._

_Never Bella. Never...I can feel this...you. Only a bit of what you are feeling but its damn near unbearable. Please just stay with me...focus on me. I'm right here._

So that's what I did...for three hours. I concentrated on the feel, sound and smell of Alice Cullen. My best friend, my soul mate. _I love you, Alice._

I heard her sigh and swallow as she wrapped her arm around my neck so that my head could rest on her chest, holding me close. _I love you, Isabelle...my Bella._ And with that, the pain subsided and suddenly I was myself again, shivering, naked and wrapped in her eternal arms with my face buried in her neck.

_**Home.**_


	12. Ch 11 Sometimes Strengths Are Weakness

**A/N: Thank you all for your wonderful feedback! It really means a lot to me and gives me a drive to keep writing! It's nice to know that there are some of you that are actually into this story! I felt pretty crappy for taking nearly a month to update and I'm so thankful that some of you have come back even after all that time that I wanted to get you a long update (yesterday) and another one today. This one isn't quite as long but I wanted to make up for it somewhat! My next update will be in a few days when I figure out more of which direction I want to cover first!**

**Sadly, I do not own The Twilight Saga and am not affiliated with S. Meyer nor do I own any of her wonderfully created world. I *DO* however own Elizabeth Hadden and Karen Weber.**

**-_-_-_-_-**

**Ch 11 Sometimes Strengths are your Weakness**

---

As I lay there shivering in Alice's arms I couldn't stop the repeated visions of my past flashing through my mind. I'm not sure how long we had been there, but the morning sun was just beginning to rise so it had obviously been all night. I buried my face deeper into her neck breathing in her soothing scent deeply.

-----

** "_Isabelle, are you alright? You're shaking...how can you possibly be cold?" Elizabeth wrapped her arms around me gently, hugging me close. "Come, we should get back." She sighed and I could see the unshed tears in her eyes. "Best to get this over with rather than draw it out any longer." They way she said it, so matter of fact, caused a violent shudder to rip through me. I felt sick, physically ill at what was happening._**

**"_Is it really this easy for you? To walk away from me...from us?" I whispered, pained. The pain was so much. My insides felt as if they were on fire and my body wanted to explode. I was hot, sweating and shaking. Is this was a broken heart feels like?_**

**"_Of course not!" She cried, "how can you ask me that? It's the only choice we have; I just have to be the one to make it." She sniffed and turned my face to look at her. "We have to get you home, you aren't well. You must be coming down ill." _**

**_I pulled away when she grabbed my arm to lead me back to town, "No. You go. I'll come back when I'm ready." I turned and walked a few steps away from her, breathing deeply. I desperately wanted to just collapse and scream. Scream out my pain until I was no longer able to speak at all._**

**"_Isabelle really you are sick. We must get back and get you seen to. What will our mothers think if I go back alone and for you to come back later sick? Now please, let's not make this any harder than it already is." She started walking towards me but paused when I held my hand up for her to stop._**

**"_Please...I can't." I sobbed, dropping to my knees. "I don't think I can handle this...I can't go on pretending I don't love you and I can't act as if we're nothing more than friends!" I could barely breathe. The tremors were growing more and more violent as the sweat rolled down my face. I felt the need to vomit but before I could I was quickly on my feet and pulled her into my arms. "Tell me you don't love me," I screamed at her, "tell me you don't love me and I'll walk away." I grabbed onto her shoulders and pulled her into me, pressing my lips firmly against hers. _**

**_My Elizabeth melted into me right away, kissing me back. After only a few short moments I felt her stiffen and push me back, staggering back to put a mere foot of space between us. "Isabelle I can't. We can't." She looked up into my eyes, bit her lip and her broken words lied right to my face. "I don't love you anymore."_**

**_My breath was ragged, the world began to spin around me. I felt off balance as the intense heat hammered my chest, knocking the air from my lungs. I couldn't understand why I couldn't breathe but it was when I felt her hands grip my shoulders that I realized I was screaming in agony. Part of me knew she was scared, that she was trying to talk to me, to get me to come back from this horrid place in my mind but I couldn't. As I raised my eyes from her moving lips to which I heard no sound, to her eyes that were boring into mine a new scream sounded from my lips as I felt myself being split into two as I slammed my eyes shut and grit my teeth._**

**_I heaved as I struggled to catch my breath and open my eyes. Elizabeth was lying on the soft grass, gasping violently, struggling for breath. Her eyes were wide as she looked at me, her hand locked into the thick hair on my neck. That's when I looked down, seeing her covered in blood. Five long vicious claw marks trailed down her neck, her chest and to her hip in a disgusting diagonal line. Blood seeped from the wounds, covering my paws that were on either side of her small fragile frame. Her hand trailed up further to the side of my face, holding it gently. Looking into my eyes she showed me the truth, that she did love me and opened her lips slightly, "Isabelle," she started, and then closed her eyes and her body lay still._**

**_I rubbed my nose along her cheek, trying to rouse her though I knew it was a futile effort. Slinking back away from her body that I had destroyed I raised my head to the night sky and let out a blood curdling howl._**

**_-----_**

I moaned into her neck, the violent shaking returning as I hugged her impossibly close to me. I didn't care that I was lying naked in my new loves arms...remembering the death, no, the _murder_ of my last. I was trying to recover myself but the pain just kept coming in waves until I knew I had to relive it again, to share it with the one, the only one that could possibly help me to finally move on.

Her arms tightened around me and she placed several soft kisses along my cheek and neck. _Bella...I'm here. Thank you, for sharing that with me. I know it wasn't easy. I could feel your pain, through your thoughts. I'm so sorry you had to go through that...that you're still going through it. It wasn't your fault; you didn't hurt her on purpose. You know that, and she knew that. I know you blame yourself, maybe even hate yourself for it but deep down, you love her and you __**never**__ meant to hurt her._

I sighed and pulled my head out of her neck just enough to make eye contact with her. I saw the love and the worry reflected in her gorgeous gold eyes. _I did love her and part of me always will. She was my first love, but you are my true love. You are my eternal soul mate. You know that, don't you?_ I cupped her smooth cheek in my hand, stroking gently.

_Of course I do. I never expect you to forget her or to stop loving her. I had a first love._ She smiled down at me softly, _I know how it feels and I know that although you move on, you never stop loving them and you never forget. It's a part of what makes us who we are._ She leaned down and ever so slowly pressed her cool lips to mine.

I knew she was being deliberately slow, giving me a chance to pull away if I needed to. I whimpered into her kiss and sighed at the feel of her fingers trailing down my naked side leaving a trail of goose bumps. _Oh geeze that's right, I'm naked._

Alice smirked into our kiss and pulled back slightly, "Yes you are." She purred and I giggled softly. "You're beautiful Bella."

I took a small breath and smiled back, "Thank you." I swallowed, having not spoken in the last 12 hours, "But you are the rare beauty in this dark world." I lowered my eyes and played with her fingers, "The only light in _my_ dark world," I whispered.

"Then we're a perfect match because I've never seen the sun this bright until you came along." She smiled and looked up as the sun slowly made its way above us into the sky. I heard her gasp softly before smiling down at me. "Looks like this works too."

I knew to expect the shimmer of sparkles that graced her features in the sunlight but was shocked to see that my own bare body was glistening as well. "This has never happened...I hadn't let it go so long but I always kind of wondered." I turned my hands over looking intently at them trying to find the source of each tiny diamond that seemed to be embedded into my skin.

"Absolutely gorgeous," Alice whispered and pressed her lips softly to mine once more before pulling back. It was then I noticed her eyes had a faraway look and a slight cloudy haze covered the brightness in her eyes. "We need to get back, Karen called Carlisle looking for you. She was worried when you didn't come home. They covered for you, said that we were up having a 'giggling girls night' and fell asleep watching a movie." She smiled and I mentally reminded myself to thank her family for their cover. "We should tell them what happened as well. I'm sure Jacob's quick departure was to inform the pack of your return...and we need to figure out what to do about you."

I looked at her quizzically, "What?"

She shook her head and gave me a warm smile, "I just mean that this...werewolf part of you can't be healthy Bella. I've seen the wolves phase and sure I've heard the first few times can be somewhat painful until you've gotten used to what to expect but you were in agony. I don't think the strengthening vampire part of you was too happy with the wolf that came bursting out. Our forms aren't exactly meant for shape-shifting." She pulled me up and laced her fingers with mine.

"You're right, I hadn't really thought about it like that. I haven't phased since..." I trailed off, knowing she understood without having to speak it. "But um..." I looked down and smirked, "I can't very well walk into your house looking like this."

Alice looked me up and down while purring deep in her chest. "No, I suppose you can't. Not that I'm complaining but I don't want my brothers, or Rosalie for that matter to get any ideas and try to steal you away from me."

I laughed and then laughed harder at her serious glare. "Alice, no one in this world could take me away from you."

She smiled and pulled me towards her house. "Come on, I'll leave you at the tree's edge where they can't see you and run in to grab you some clothes." We took off back towards the house and I had to shake my head. '_After the break an exclusive episode...Hybrid human, vampire, werewolf seen streaking through the woods with her vampire mate, next on Maury.'_

Alice's laugh carried throughout the forest. _You are so delightfully weird._

~_~_~_~

Hope you all enjoyed!!

~Nick


	13. Ch 12 Puzzling the Pieces Together

**A/N: Wow...I honestly don't know what to say but THANK YOU for all of the awesome feedback. These last few chapters have seen some awesome comments and tons of story alerts and favourite story and author alerts. Wow. Thank you guys so so much. It means the world to me to know that you are enjoying this fic. I only hope I don't disappoint you. The next chapter will be a couple days at least...it will be uhm, a bit naughty and I want to make it good. ;) **

**Also, I will give a little sneak peek into the next update...once it's written and before I post it... to whoever leaves the first correct answer in their feedback. What song does Bella have stuck in her head and who sings it? (EJ you don't get to answer this one!) :P**

**---**

**~_~_~_~**

**Ch 12 Puzzling the Pieces Together **

After Alice had gotten me some clothes she drove me home to Karen's so I could get our story straightened out and not have her worrying after me. I didn't want to tell anyone in Alice's family about what had happened yet but I knew I couldn't put it off for long. I just needed to try and process things myself before getting bombarded with questions about my past...and now future issues.

Karen didn't drill me and really she actually didn't seem to mind at all. Her only request was that in the future I let her know where I am in case I don't come home so that she doesn't worry. She seems to adore the Cullen family, particularly Esme so there were no issues there. The issue I was concerned about was Angela. She wasn't in school on Friday and I can only guess it was due to what went on Thursday night. Here it is now Saturday and I don't know if I should call her, go by her place or steer clear until I've talked to Carlisle. Maybe he can call a meeting and play mediator? I shook my head, I shouldn't keep him in the middle but he does have a somewhat civil relationship with the wolves. I just need to know what they plan to do about 'me'.

I decided I needed to suck it up and head over to see Alice. I told her to head home and prepare her family for our meeting and explanation and I would have Karen drop me off on her way to Port Angeles. Alice spent the night with me the last two nights, holding me as I **tried** to sleep. That was beginning to be a human trait that was quickly leaving me. I actually missed it. She was quick to leave in the early mornings so that Karen didn't catch us. I wasn't ready for that conversation yet. Luckily even though the werewolf in me kept me out of Alice's visions, it didn't keep Karen out and avoid any awkward moments.

Karen was just pouring some juice as I came down the stairs. She smiled as she saw me and handed me the glass, turning to pour another for herself. "Good morning, Bella, how did you sleep?"

It took all I had not to roll my eyes or snicker, "I had a peaceful night." I replied honestly. Having a gorgeous brunette angel holding me tight was as peaceful as it could get.

"I'm glad to hear that. So I just got a call from Esme, she said they invited you over for the remainder of the weekend and wanted to clear it with me." She grinned and sat down at the table next to me. "I simply adore her...she didn't need to apologize about last time, I know how you kids can be but it was sweet of her none the less."

I nodded my head, "Esme is something. So it is alright with you then?"

"Yes, of course." She paused and I could tell she had something on her mind. "Bella, can I be quite honest with you?" Seeing my nod she stood up and paced the small kitchen slowly. "You're an adult Bella. Yes, you are in my care for the next few months until you turn 18 but I know you are a responsible woman. I also know that you are a very special woman. I won't pretend to understand, or to say that I'm not curious but there's something different about you...as well as the Cullen's."

I know my face couldn't have been that composed at her statement but I tried my hardest. Before I got a chance to reply she continued, "Your family has always been very good to mine. I know there's none of them left now," she paused, eyeing me a bit, "but I was always told one day...a unique girl would need me, and to help her without reserve. I know that girl is you. I don't want to know anymore than I already do, as I think it's best for the both of us. Just know that I am here for you, should you need something and I won't ask questions or pry."

I swallowed and stood, wrapping my arms around her. Other than the Cullen's, Karen was the only family I had. The last link of my true family. "Karen...do you know what ever happened to my uhm...great grandma Renee?" I bit my lip.

She looked at me curiously, "I only know what was talked about, hearsay if you will. I can't say how much if any truth is to it, Bella. However, word was that...she was a bit wild, disappeared one night after a passing man came through town selling furs. Some people thought he took her against her will as he gave off quite the uneasy impression among most. However, there are those that thought it wouldn't be past her to take off." She looked down almost as if ashamed to speak of my family in such a way.

"What do you think?" I asked her, planning on this being my last question.

"I think she was swept away by the mystery of the unknown. Now let's get going, can't keep the Cullen's waiting!" She grabbed her purse and keys and headed out the door leaving me to follow.

The mystery of the unknown. I snorted. Fuck now I'm an episode of Unsolved Mysteries. My life is just going to be one giant puzzle isn't it? Why should I care after 85 years? My own mother, if she did run off with this man, this Demitrius, why do I care to search for her? She obviously wasn't concerned for me. My body began to get warm and I started to tremble. I was mad. I grit my teeth and thought of Alice. I took an unnecessary breath and steadied myself, grabbing my overnight bag. I wanted to hate my mother, but the part of me that feared she _was_ taken, without a choice...wouldn't allow me to. So now I'm back to square one.

~_~_~_~

The drive to the Cullen's was peaceful. Karen was humming along to some music on the radio and I was listening to my iPod. I had this song stuck in my head and it seemed so fitting it was almost ridiculous. I finally listened enough that I knew the words by heart without the use of the iPod. Putting it away as we pulled up their long lane I smiled as I saw Alice on the porch waiting for me. I tried to put the pain, anger and confusion I was feeling in regards to my mother aside for now.

Karen kissed my cheek and gave a cheery hello and a wave to Alice as I got out of the car. I hugged her and wished her a good weekend as I started up the short walkway to the porch. Alice was waiting patiently as I walked at human speed in case Karen was still watching. I could see by the look on her face she wasn't quite as patient as she was making herself appear. I smirked. _Another day's been laid to waste...in my disgrace._ Karen was out of sight and Alice pulled me into her arms and hugged me close. _Stuck in my head again, feels like I'll never leave this place, there's no escape. I'm my own worst enemy._

"Oh Bella," Alice pulled back and eyed me, "Come on, we'll get this figured out. Everyone is waiting inside." She grabbed my hand and pulled me inside until we reached the sitting room. Esme had a glass of iced tea waiting for me but I noticed Alice slightly shake her head. "I think she's beyond that point now." I could only nod and smile back.

_I've given up, I'm sick of feeling. Is there nothing you can say? Take this all away, I'm suffocating...tell me what the fuck is wrong with me? _

Alice whipped her head around to me quickly. I thought she was going to say something but she stopped. Tilting her head slightly, she spoke...in my mind that is. _Bella are you alright? Do you need to hunt?_

"Are you thirsty? Should you hunt before we begin?" Esme asked soothingly touching my shoulder.

I looked between the two of them wondering if they were sharing thoughts now and grinned. "No we're not; great minds just think alike." Alice answered and bumped her hip with Esme's.

"Alright well if everyone is ready, let's begin." Carlisle started and the entire family nodded and focused their attention on me.

"Well I'm assuming Alice explained what happened?" They all nodded but Edward had an almost pained look on his face when looking at Alice. "What? Why are you looking at her like that?"

Edward tore his eyes from Alice and looked to me, "I'm sorry, I just...normally when Alice tells a story, a first-hand account, I can see it in her mind as she's telling it. Despite the detail she gave to us I can't get anything from her, I still can't. It's a bit unnerving."

We all talked for what seemed like hours. We came to a few conclusions that made sense. As far as Alice and I were concerned, whenever we shared our 'walkie talkie' moments as Emmett calls them, Edward can't read it because it is only for Alice. Her mind is protected through our connection. It's almost as if I am somehow shielding her, whether I'm around or not. We put this theory to test and I focused on the fact that I was ready for the family to know my account of what happened and was startled when Edward jumped up from his seat on the couch. "I saw...I couldn't see it in your mind, but as you described what you felt, and Alice pictured it, I could see it!"

Apparently along with being some mutant hybrid freak I am also going to have an extra ability as a vampire. A shield. I was beginning to wonder if some kid was dreaming and I was stuck inside his wacky broadway nightmare. I was just happy that our thoughts were safe from the rest of the family, let alone knowing that at full potential I could perhaps do more. I can't think about that now. It's too much to take in. _I don't know what to take, thought I was focused but I'm scared. I'm not prepared. I hyperventilate, looking for hope somehow somewhere and no one cares..._

"Bella seriously! Why are you thinking like that today?" Alice exclaimed looking at me with a pointed pain-filled look. "Do you really think no one cares?"

I had to look like a fish out of water with my mouth opening and closing but no sound coming out. "I don't...what?"

"Ever since you got here you've been thinking you're a disgrace, that you're stuck in your head, your memories I presume. Thinking of yourself as your own worst enemy...and now that no one cares about you?" If it were possible for her to, I would swear she was going to cry.

"Wait wait wait." Rosalie interrupted, "Alice, you sound like that crappy band that Emmett listens to." She looked to her boyfriend who nodded.

"Stuck in your head too, Bella? It's pretty catchy, one of my favourites but Rose here doesn't care for it." Emmett beamed and high-fived me.

I turned back to Alice, "It's just a song sweetie, and it's been stuck in my head all morning." I cupped her cheek and leaned my forehead against hers; _I know you care, Alice. I could never think otherwise. The song is sort of fitting though._ I shrugged.

"I hate to interrupt, but I am thoroughly confused." Jasper added, "Bella, I thought you and Alice could hear each other when it was to, or about one another?" I nodded, "So if you just had a song stuck in your head, how is Alice hearing that unless it was directed to her?"

I didn't have an answer for that. Alice actually seemed surprised at his question; I guess she didn't see that coming. "No I didn't." We laughed. "Okay so...Carlisle?"

He stood and paced a bit, "This is completely unprecedented. It shouldn't be possible...not with the connection as I have learned of it through the only three other couples that have this ability. Excuse me; I want to make a couple calls." He was gone in a flash.

"Bella, is there anything we can do for you? I know Carlisle will get some answers on this, but more pressing are you feeling alright? I can't imagine how painful your phasing must have been on you." Esme sat down beside me and clasped my hand.

"It was...excruciating. All I could think about was protecting Alice. He was charging right for her and he looked so...so **vicious**!" I trembled, flashes of Jacob's hate filled wolf eyes charging at the woman I love and was thrown back into the memory of my own wolf self killing a woman I had loved. It was too much, I hit my knees and doubled over shaking, and gripping at the floor so hard I was pressing my fingers into the shiny hard wood.

_Bella...focus love. I'm right here with you, I'm safe. Don't let this take you under, fight it._ Alice was cupping my cheek and rubbing my back smoothly as I inhaled and exhaled deeply. "I'm...I'm okay."

"Geeze Bella...you okay?" Emmett's large from was kneeled in front of me and I could feel the soothing calm Jasper was pushing towards me in waves.

I nodded, "Yeah...sorry." I lowered my head and stood up. "Thank you all for your concern. I think while Carlisle is gathering information I should go hunt, run, you know just do something." I was fidgeting. _Alice?_

"Of course Bella." Esme responded, "I'm going to have Carlisle set up a meeting with the wolves as well. We need to figure out the best way to take care of you so that you don't get hurt. We also need to know what they know and if they have any intentions of doing anything about it."

I nodded. I also needed to try and speak with Angela but that would take a clearer head. A smooth hand slid into my own. _Come on, Bella._ We ran up into the cliffs a bit further than usual. We didn't speak, we didn't need to. Just being in each other's presence was enough. I leaned back against a large rock and closed my eyes, pulling Alice into me and holding her tight. _I love you._ I smiled.

_I love you, Alice._ I opened my eyes and claimed her lips with my own. I felt one of her hands slid up and into my hair, gripping my neck and I couldn't hold in a moan. I gripped her lithe hips and squeezed, pulling her tighter to me yet. Parting my lips slightly I slowly ran the tip of my tongue along her upper lip. This time it was Alice that groaned and sucked my tongue between her lips. I felt my knees weaken, and a fire surge from my heart down between my legs. I had never felt so turned on in my life. I had such a deep intense love for this beauty in my arms that it was almost overwhelming. Alice whimpered and fought for dominance in our kiss, pushing her tongue between my lips, claiming me. _Alice_ I groaned in my head as she trailed her lips down my neck, licking and nipping until she reached my shoulder, sucking softly.

"Isabelle," she husked and I thought I would die on the spot. I had never heard my name said with such reverence. I pulled her face back to mine claiming her lips once more and trailed my hands down her sides slowly feeling her tremble. I smiled into our kiss. _You have no idea what you're doing to me, Bella._

I pulled back slowly, to look into her eyes, "I think I have a pretty good idea." I rested my forehead against hers, rubbing our noses together gently, "I'm so in love with you." _Oh God..._I heard in my head and bit my lip. "I'm in love with you, Mary Alice Brandon-Cullen." She kissed me. Hard. "So fucking in love with you."

Her leg slid between mine and we both groaned at the contact, her eyes boring into mine, "And I am in love with you, Isabelle Marionette Swan. My gorgeous Bella." She pressed her lips to mine gently, "So. Fucking. In love. With **you**." She punctuated each pause with a kiss.

I wrapped my arms around her waist and nuzzled her neck, taking in her delicious scent. _I can't wait to make love to this woman._ My eyes snapped open when I heard her gasp, realizing she could hear that obviously. _I won't push...but I won't deny it either. When you're ready._ I whispered honestly to her.

Her eyes locked with mine and were so dark they were nearly black, "I want us to belong to each other completely." _**I'm ready.**_


	14. AUTHORS NOTE

**A/N:**

**I apologize in advance if I got any of you excited thinking this was an update and not just an...author note update!**

**I just wanted to say thank you to all of you who have been reviewing this fic. I'm certainly not THE writer in the family, that would be my wife, breathe4her (on here and on Spashley) (aka Tara's Shadow if any of you read Buffy/Tara fanfic on the old Kitten Board). She is the truly devoted writer with a passion for it. I just like to tinker now and again. ******** She is my inspiration on this. I aspire to her greatness! (No really, I do. I love you, babe)**

**Anyway, there are a few of you commenting that I can reply to but I want to let you know that your reviews mean a lot to me! It's nice that people take the time to leave a quick like to let writers know you like their work. **

**Grangergirl22, thanks so much for your reviews! You always point out parts that you liked or identify with and that helps a lot! So please, keep them coming! And as far as loving the Momma Drama, well, I used to watch a lot and it always just amused me how stupid people were, so I wanted to incorporate that into Bella's sense of humor. (Sure she's younger than the cullen's but you HAVE to get bored and watch SOME crazy shows when you have all that extra time on your hands.) ;)**

**I have to admit...I am kind of surprised that NO ONE pointed out my slipped in Buffy reference in the last chapter! Shame on you all! Lol j/k. :P I will probably be throwing more in...from Buffy, Charmed, Xena, Dead Like Me...all my fav shows! So if anyone can pick them out, let me know!! **

**Again, thank you all, it means a ton! The next update with some sexy goodness will be up this weekend. (I'm a bit nervous but hopefully I can pull it off and get you all hot and bothered! Lol)**

**Take care!**

**~Nickole**


	15. Ch 13 There's a Fire in My Blood

**A/N: Hope you all enjoy this...I'm very nervous about it! I have a bit more but decided I would need to break it into two parts. So, this chapter is 13A and 13B will be up in a day or two. Anyway, hope you all enjoy and if you aren't into loving and consensual sex between two women then please, go find something else to read because you have been forewarned! **

**~_~_~_~**

**Ch 13A There's A Fire in My Blood That I'm Sharing with You**

**---**

_Oh sweet mother of God did she really just mean what I thought she meant?_ Our eyes were locked; passion was burning like an open flame. "Alice," I whispered, caressing her cheek with my right hand, "Are you sure?"

She smiled and smoothed the crease that had formed over my brow, "Yes." She grinned and kissed me softly, _I want to make love with you, Bella._ Her voice, so clear and smooth in my head caused my heart to race and she grinned. _It's strange...you being part vampire, sharing some of our scent, the cool hard skin, reflexes...yet having a heartbeat and more than just animal blood coursing through your body...it's intoxicating. So uniquely you._ Our lips met once again and I felt my body led a few feet to the side into a small opening between the tall rock boulders.

Smiling into the kiss I flipped our positions and leaned her back until her weight was in my arms as I lowered her to the ground, kneeling beside her but never breaking our contact. _Is the human blood in me too much?_ I asked slightly worried though deep down I knew it wasn't. She shook her head and I lowered my body over hers with the majority of my weight on my left side leaving my right hand free to slowly glide over her smooth skin. She closed her eyes when I started at her temples and trailed my fingers lightly down the side of her face, to her neck, shoulders and coming to still over her non-beating heart. She opened her eyes when I paused and smiled sadly. I shook my head before she could ask, _The fact that your heart doesn't physically beat doesn't bother me in the least. I know your soul lives for me._ If she could have cried I think a tear may have escaped. I kissed the corner of her eyes and rubbed my nose against hers before claiming her lips and allowing my hand to continue down her sides coming to rest on her hip. She whimpered and raised her leg allowing one of mine to sleep between hers. The friction was warming me instantly and I already felt as if I was losing control.

We rocked our bodies together slowly, kissing deeply all the while. When I felt her hips get a bit more forceful I pulled back straddling her waist and pulled her into a sitting position with me. Gripping her soft blue fitting shirt in my hands I pulled it up over her head in one swift movement. I barely got a glance of smooth perfection cased in black lace before I felt my own shirt being pulled away. I nervously slid the straps of her bra down her arms and leaned forward to taste the skin of her neck and shoulder. Feeling her shudder beneath me sent a thrill through me even before I felt her own lips sucking gently at my shoulder. I hadn't realized I was rocking against her until I felt her delicate fingers lowering the zipper on my jeans. _Together..._ She looked up at me, not understanding my request. _I want this equal...together. I need it that way, please._ My thoughts sounded breathy and slightly scared even in my own head.

Alice smiled and pushed me back slightly so that she could reach her own pants and without breaking eye contact with me completely disrobed in front of me. Still laying before me she tugged at my sides and helped me shimmy out of the rest of my own clothing. We stared in awe of each other for what seemed like an eternity before I brought my body back against hers and our skin was connected at every inch possible. Despite the cool temperatures of our bodies it felt as if we were flames licking at each other as the friction increased. Resuming our previous position with our legs intertwined we once again resumed the slow erotic dance, grinding into one another's thighs. I kissed her deeply, slowly licking her upper lip. Her breath caught and her hands gripped into my hair tightly as she assaulted my mouth with her silky tongue. I knew she could hear the thoughts in my head...when I pictured hours together just making love and exploring each other. I knew because every single time a thought of how much I loved her, craved her and needed her passed through my mind her grip tightened and her inner voice whimpered. And every time I thought of what I wanted to do to her, share with her I felt her nails and heard her groan. I'd never felt anything this intense in my life. I wasn't even aware it was possible to feel like this.

I pulled out of our kiss to taste her neck, sucking hard and gripping her hip tighter as I rocked my body against her. I could feel myself coating her thigh and was shocked at how wet I was. I pressed into her again a bit harder and groaned out loud when her hips lifted to rub her wet center along my thigh, dripping with her essence. _Oh Alice...baby_. It was too much and all thoughts flew out of my mind. My eyes slammed shut as all I could hear was her panting and moaning in my mind and out loud as our bodies took on a mind of their own and our grinding got faster and harder. Her hips were straining for more friction and I pressed into her as hard as I dared to help her out before feeling both our bodies tense, our eyes opened and locked on to each others as we both cried out with our minds.

Despite her unnecessary need to breathe both of us were panting, still gazing into each other's eyes. _Wow._ I blushed and bit my lip. _And wow, _she said again and I couldn't help but cock my head to the side curiously. _Your eyes...those beautiful deep brown pool have been getting lighter now that you've been feeding but right now..._ I waited for her to continue, wondering what had happened with my eyes to cause such a reaction. _Bella your eyes are still a gorgeous dark brown and I've heard eyes darken during love making,_ she grinned, _but yours have taken on a whole new trait. They have a starburst type pattern in them that is the brightest gold I've ever seen. If I hadn't been watching your eyes the whole time I would have sworn you put in contacts._

I smiled and tried to picture what my eyes looked like when a thought occurred to me. _Well actually, you didn't watch them the entire time._ I laughed a bit when she smacked my shoulder.

_I think that's when they changed._ She thought seriously to me. _And the gold is getting darker again..._ She captured my lips and raised her hips earning a gasp from me. _You're still soaked Isabelle..._ I not only heard but felt the purr in her chest. I sat back up off her earning a growl in protest and pulled her up quickly to sit in my lap as she wrapped her legs around my waist. _Oh God..._ I kept eye contact with her as I pulled her by the hips causing her dripping pussy to rub gently against my lower stomach.

I kissed down her chest leaning her back just enough to lick the length of my tongue around a taut nipple before wrapping my lips around it and sucking it slowly. I alternated between a gentle slow sucking to openly licking with the flat of my tongue. Alice was holding my arms for balance as she leaned back a bit more, grunting as she felt me switch nipples and ground into me harder. Keeping my left arm securely around her back I let my right hand drift between our bodies until I felt the fine hairs covering my angel's sweet spot. I let my thumb dip down into her folds gently feeling her tight bundle of nerves for the first time. I continued to lazily suck at her nipples but the intensity was becoming too much. "Oh yess," she hissed above me and arched her back creating a fraction of space between our bodies, allowing me better access to her. With that, I turned my hand to cup her, my breath hitching at the feel of her wetness dripping onto my fingers as I stroked her slowly. _Oh Bella._ I knew I couldn't draw this out much longer before I completely lost control but I didn't want to rush it. The goddess in my arms was tensed with need, her once fluid rocks against me turning into jerky rough movements.

Releasing her nipple I licked from the center of her chest up her neck before claiming her lips, thrusting my tongue into her cool mouth and slowly slid two fingers inside her. _Oh oh oh Bella_ her thoughts assaulted me as I began a gentle pace within her. The feeling of her surprised me. She was so warm and slick, her walls tight around my fingers. I stroked gently, sliding deeper until I felt a stopping point. My mind reeled at what this meant and if possible I fell deeper in love with Mary Alice Brandon at that moment. _Only you, Bella. Now please, claim me as your own._

I knew what was about to happen was supposed to hurt and I did not want to hurt her in any way. Being that she's a vampire, I wasn't sure what that meant. _Alice, will it hurt you? _I continued to slowly stroke her to her barrier, in and out slowly as she rocked against me.

She leaned back ever so slightly and kissed me deeply. _I'm a virgin and a vampire, I really have no idea. But it's what I want...together, remember?_ I smiled and kissed her back, using my thumb to apply a firm yet gentle pressure to her clit as my thrusts inside her got a bit more forceful. I could feel the barrier at my fingertips giving ever so slightly as Alice's movements got more forceful as well. She was whimpering now, her arms around my back and her face in my neck kissing and sucking in between moans and grunts of pleasure. I knew the moment was coming and that I would be claiming Alice as my own in mere seconds for all eternity. It was at that moment I knew what had to happen like a shock of revelation revealed to me at this intimate moment. _Oh Bella, now, please..._

_Alice, baby..._ I thought to her as I stroked her upper wall with my fingers, pulling back just before giving her what she wanted and stroking back again. _Bite me, Alice. Drink._ My mind panted to her as I sucked harder on her neck. I felt her tense slightly but kept rocking against me, drowning in the euphoria she was feeling. _Trust me, Alice..._ She groaned and slammed her hips against me harder, forcing my fingers deeper into her as she sunk her razor sharp teeth into the space between my neck and shoulder. I felt once again a white hot surge go through me and pressed my fingers into her as deeply as I could. I felt my soul burning inside me as Alice rode out her earth shattering orgasm while drinking my unique human, vampire and werewolf blood mixture. As she was falling from the precipice she tore her blood dripping lips away from the punctures in my skin and screamed my name in an erotic moan.

Licking her lips and taking a shuddering breath she looked into my eyes where I noticed the glowing gold had dark brown streaks resembling that of a starburst design. I smiled and kissed her, licking her lips and allowing my tongue to slip between her lips. I groaned at the taste of my own blood mixed with her venom in her mouth. _Fuck that was so intense. Was that okay?_

Alice looked into my eyes with an evil glint, the gold in her eyes darkening until it was nearly black. _My turn, _she thought to me as she raised her body up so that my fingers came out of her slowly, covered in her wetness. I sucked my fingers into my mouth and heard her whimper when I did so. Pressing me back so that she was now over me she ground her dripping pussy onto my stomach leaving a wet trail as she slid her body down and sucked on my stomach in the same spot. That was the most erotic thing I had ever seen. I was actually jealous that she was licking up her cum off me and I was unable to. She looked up to me and smirked, hearing my thoughts. _Would you like to have a taste from the source? I'll share if you will._

My eyes widened and I slammed my head on the ground and couldn't help but squirm as I felt her body twist and turn until she was backing up towards me and lowering her glistening pussy over my face. It was then I felt her grip my thighs and blow a cool breath of air between my folds. I wrapped my arms around her hips gripping her ass and licking my lips. _I've just died and gone to heaven._

~_~_~_~


	16. Ch 13B Drink of Me

**A/N: Sorry it's taken me a few days on this update. My mind has been in a haze trying to figure out what I want to come next for our dynamic duo! So this is pure smut...lol I hope you don't mind too much that there is only a bit more plot development here due to said smut. However it is a good bit that will shed some light on other things in the future.**

**Thank you to everyone for your amazing feedback! I try to reply to everyone but I'm sure I've missed one here and there so if I did, I apologize and it wasn't on purpose!**

**Now enjoy! - Nickole**

**~_~_~_~_~**

**Ch 13B Drink of Me If You Deem Me Strong Enough**

**~_~**

Oh sweet power above...

Yes, my mind was reeling. I had just shared the most intense and intimate moment _ever_ with the love of my existence and now I was staring into a sight that had my mouth watering and my clit throbbing. I licked my lips and squeezed the hips above me as I pulled her down to make contact with my awaiting mouth. I groaned; the silky feel of her slick folds against my lips made me crazy. My lower body tensed and relaxed as I felt Alice's cool tongue gliding deliciously slow up and down and back and forth over my heated core. I was losing the game she was playing with me. Each time my tongue got faster, harder and more insistent on her, she got teasingly slower on me. It was maddening but felt so fucking good all at the same time.

_Alice...what are you doing to me?_ I sucked gently on one of her folds, feeling her press herself into me just slightly harder. Her tongue dipped just inside my opening and my hips bucked. _Fuck me that felt incredible..._ I grunted internally and somehow just knew she had an evil smirk on those perfect lips. I had never been one for cursing too much but right now I felt like I could give any sailor a run for their money. I sucked on her clit briefly before pressing my tongue into her deeply, humming against her. I grinned when I felt her concentration drop slightly knowing I wasn't completely losing the battle.

_God Bella I feel like I could just melt into you...it's so intense._ She whimpered and lightly plunged her tongue into me in a back and forth staccato like fashion. My hips couldn't be restrained as they rose trying to take more of her into me. _You like this don't you baby?_ She purred and I felt her nose against my ass when her hands gripped me, keeping me up slightly as she plunged her tongue into me deeply. I was at her mercy, my hips pumping in time with her head. She maneuvered one hand enough so that she could stroke my clit and I pulled away from her to cry out her name.

As my body began to still she was still relentless yet gentle as she licked softly all over my lips and clit. She kissed everything she could reach while telling me how much she loved and craved me. I smiled and returned to my hungry devouring of her pussy loving the sound of her whimper and her grip tightening as I claimed her again. My tongue drove deeply, lapping up her juices as they flowed. With a shuddering orgasm she collapsed her body onto mine as I licked up every drop and finished with a gentle kiss to her clit. _Come here._ And she did, turning to stretch the length of her body over mine and claiming my lips in a passionate embrace. I wrapped my arms around her, stroking her back and sides softly. I just wanted to revel in the feel of her. _You are so amazing._

Alice pulled back and smiled looking into my eyes deeply. I knew she was seeing the exact reversal in my eye color that I was seeing in hers. We kissed again before she pulled me up into a sitting position. _And I'm not finished yet. Equal and together, right?_ I smiled at her and took my place on her lap, wrapping my legs around her petite waist. I couldn't hold back from kissing her. I could kiss Alice forever and never be sated of her incredible taste and feel. _Ditto my love._ I cupped the back of her neck, squeezing softly and leaned down to suck at the apex of her neck and shoulder, feeling her do the same to me. I knew she must still be able to taste the now dried blood that remained on the now healed punctures so I pressed her head against me a bit harder. _Your taste is divine._ She commented, hearing my thoughts.

_You can drink of me anytime, Alice. I belong to you. _She sighed deeply and sucked slowly at the blood stained skin. I could feel her grip on my back tighten as her right hand teased the inside of my thighs. She kept brushing her fingers just over my mound back and forth lightly. _Again, Alice...please. You have no idea how __**good**__ it feels. _I was encouraging her to drink. I wanted to share my body with her in every way possible. I was being selfish too though as I meant what I said. When she sunk her teeth into me and began to drink the most intense connection between us began that was not only soul melding but completely arousing as well.

_Only if you let me feel as well, _she whispered back and let two fingertips dip between my wet folds teasing my opening. I moaned loudly and rocked against her hard, nibbling at her neck with a bit more force. _You can do it Bella. You're strong enough and it may be a lot of animal blood but my blood is still in there too_. She was encouraging me but she really didn't need to. I **knew** her blood was still present. I could smell it and it called to me. I opened my mouth wider and bit down hard, piercing the impossibly hard skin before me. Just as she sunk her teeth into mine she drove her two fingers into me and began to set a steady but firm pace.

_**Oh my...oh fuck!**_ Were our combined thoughts. It felt as if we were still connected yet not of this world as we shared our life's blood together in this erotic dance. My hips bounced against her relentless fingers as we groaned, drank and rubbed each other's backs. _Oh Alice...I'm..._ I couldn't finish the thought as the world exploded around us. Memories were flooding my mind of Alice. A young girl playing with a puppy in a yard, an unsure and scared pre-teen struggling to fit in...And a dark place full of tears and hopelessness tugged at my heart and soul as I came down from my high. I held her to me tightly as I licked over the wounds I had caused; cleaning up the blood and watching them quickly heal. I whispered I love you over and over to her as I felt her doing the same.

I pulled back looking into her eyes and at that moment I knew we had both experienced something beyond this life and this world. We not only found the love of our life in each other but our soul mates in this existence and any other. We knew things from this point on would never be the same after what we had just shared, but no matter what we knew we would always be in it together.

"I don't...know how to explain it." She whispered, holding me tightly, "We're bound Bella. In every way possible, we are bound to each other. I can just feel it."

I nodded knowing she was right. I couldn't help but wonder about the images I was flooded with but noticed her eyes go wide. "You got them too?" She nodded, "Were they memories of me? My childhood and my youth?" Again she nodded. "What does it mean?"

"Well, we know we're bound and bound tightly at that." She smiled when I did, "But I think maybe this has something to do with our gifts, our natures, what we just shared..." She hesitated, "We're going to have to speak to Carlisle and Esme about this." I bit my lip nervously, "It's the only way to find out for sure. I know in my heart that it's nothing bad, but I also know that there is something profoundly different about us Isabelle."

I captured her lips with mine, threading my fingers through her short locks and rubbing softly. _We're in love, meant to be together as mates, I've imprinted on you, we've made love and given ourselves over to the other physically, we share each other's thoughts, we've drank from each other, we've seen memories of each other's past... yeah, there's something definitely different about us._

We continued to kiss, slowly lowering our bodies to the ground on our sides. Our legs and arms were intertwined as we just kissed, slowly but passionately. Both of us were thinking together and separately about our situation, our love and each other. Hours must have passed in our eternal embrace before I felt Alice begin to tense in my arms, a vision taking over her. I pulled back a bit to look at her perfect features and frowned slightly. Her eyes were clouded over while in her vision yet I kept feeling a pull in my mind that I didn't understand. It felt as if something was trying to get into my head, almost like that first day when Edward was prying into my thoughts. I shook my head trying to get rid of the annoying sensation as Alice blinked and regained her focus.

"It's time to go back; Carlisle has made the decision to contact the pack for a meeting." She pulled me close, kissing me deeply and caressing my tongue with hers. "I love you, Isabelle. Thank you for an incredible night." She grinned and pulled me to my feet as we both dressed.

I couldn't help but smirk and took her hand in mine as we headed back, "Oh no, thank you. That was the best six hours of my life!" We giggled and squeezed each other's hand.

_Just wait until next time..._


	17. Ch 14 Third Time's A Charm?

**A/N: So sorry about the delay in updates. I know it's been a while and I apologize! I hope some of you are still interested in this and haven't forgotten what's going on. ******** Anyhoo, please review if you like...sorry it's short but I wanted to give you something. The next update will be a bit intense and will be kind of hard to write.**

**Enjoy!!**

**~_~_~_~**

**Ch. 14 Third Time's A Charm?**

"You have _got_ to be kidding me?!" Alice raised her usually gentle voice and flailed her hands in the air. It had been two days since Carlisle made the decision to have a meeting with the La Push pack and here we were. We were all gathered at the edge of the creek bed, the border line between our land and theirs. I squeezed Alice's hand in mine trying to calm her. Sam, the second in command had suggested I spend time with them on the reservation to learn about the wolf side of me. Carlisle thought it may be beneficial. Alice didn't agree.

"Alice I'm simply saying that Bella should have the choice to learn more about herself, and hopefully about her past." He paused and sighed, looking into Alice's eyes and I knew he saw the pain I was feeling. "It may help her for the future as well."

I felt more than saw Alice's shoulders slump and her give up. She didn't need to feel as if she was giving up....or losing me but for whatever reason she did. _Alice...I'm not going anywhere._ She turned to look at me, a sad smile on her face.

"Maybe you should, Bella. I'm being selfish, really. You deserve to learn anything and everything you can without me holding you back." She leaned into me, resting her forehead against mine. _I love you enough to let you go._ I recoiled instantly.

"What do you mean by that?!" I knew everyone around us was confused but at least her family knew part of our conversation was in our heads. She wanted to let me go? _How could she want to let me go?_

"Bella no..." _I didn't mean it like that...I could NEVER let you go. I just meant with them...for a while. _I was shaking my head as she spoke before we were interrupted.

"Are they...did she imprint with your _daughter_?" Sam asked almost in disgust. He turned to Jacob, his alpha, "She needs to come with us. You see it don't you?"

Jacob was still watching us intently but let his gaze wonder around each of our family members before settling back on me. "Isabelle?"

I focused on him, turning from Alice just slightly so that he had my full attention. "Yes?"

"What is your choice in this matter? Obviously after this meeting...you are aware of who and what we are...and what is a part of you. I don't know that we can help you in regards to what happened to your mother, but I believe we can help you figure out who your father is." He watched me intently for my reaction.

"I know who my father was...the man who raised me. But I know you are speaking of who part of my heritage is. I would like to know more, learn more but I do not wish to live or spend any lengthy amount of time on the reservation. I do not want to be away from my mate, and physically I cannot." The wolves glanced around at each other before waiting for their leaders' reaction.

"You fear becoming more wolf than vampire?" He asked. I heard the mutterings of some of the younger wolves not understanding why I would chose the vampire lifestyle over the wolves.

"I fear what I am period. I don't know if I will become a vampire permanently or human or wolf should I be in their presence for too long. What I do know, is that it nearly killed me when I phased." I paused feeling Alice stiffen and hearing her gasp. She knew it was bad but I just confirmed how close it was. "I don't want that happening again. I love her, and my life with her means more to me than anything else."

"Even if that means not knowing some vital information our elders could provide you on your family...your mother?" He said it almost as a challenge...a threat if I didn't come with them.

I shook my head, "Even then. I will visit...no more than two hours at a time with your elders, and on my terms. If that is not acceptable then we have nothing more to discuss."

"We will give the elders your terms and get back to you. I hope you know what you're doing." With that they wolves backed up, phased and took off running deeply into the woods.

I turned back to the rest of the Cullen family and pulled Alice to my side. "I hope I didn't offend you Carlisle. I want to know more about my past...and what could happen to me in my future with three bloodlines running through me, but not at the expense of phasing and hurting Alice...or losing her."

Carlisle nodded and smiled, "Of course. I understand but I am glad you are going to at least meet with them should they accept your terms. I think they will. They are curious about you and your abilities and what that could mean to their people."

"What could it mean?" Alice asked the question we were both thinking.

Edward spoke up before Carlisle could answer, "A superior race to protect their people." His face hardened, "They were thinking that if you could spend time back and forth to safely maintain your vampire traits and those of the werewolf then you could also...procreate with them."

"Are they insane?!" I screamed. I shuddered and felt the white hot surge course through my veins. My body began to shudder and I ground my teeth while closing my eyes. I felt Alice's hands on my face and could hear her whispering to me but everything was turning red around me. To think they could actually consider me...with one of them, to spawn a new race? To be with ANYONE other than my soul mate? My Alice? "No...No...NOOOO!" I couldn't stop it, I started to fall to my knees but felt Alice trying to wrap her arms around me while my body convulsed. _Stop this stop this stop this. You're going to hurt her Isabelle, stop!! _I was screaming in my head but couldn't will the change from happening. I wasn't even around the wolves for an hour and...

"Oh god..."

I could vaguely hear the female voice to know they knew what was coming but couldn't tell who it was except that it wasn't Alice. I spun on my heel and ran as hard and as fast as I could. I had to get away from her before it happened. She was gaining on me..._did she have no self preservation_?! I jumped frantically trying to put more distance between us as I felt my cold hard body enveloped in a fire so hot it had to outdo the sun. I heard her screams as my body suddenly shattered like concrete, the sound like a jack hammer pounding the pavement. I was in pieces, literally as I fell towards the ground. Just before I hit I could feel the pieces fusing back together just in time for me to slam into the hard ground. I moaned...but it came out as a howl. The world was going black and just before I lost consciousness I could see her beautiful golden eyes pleading with me.

_Don't you leave me!_

~_~_~_~_~

**Reviews are love!!! :D**


	18. Ch 15 Curb the Pain

**A/N: Okay so here's another for you. Still not crazy long but all I can do tonight! Hopefully this will tide you over for a bit while my brain continues to figure out how I want the next few pieces to go.**

**Enjoy!!**

**~_~_~**

**Ch 15 Curb the Pain**

**--**

I've always wondered what it'd be like to die. After all these years of living a nearly immortal life I couldn't fathom what it would be like to truly die. Would it hurt? Would it be quick? I guess all that would depend on how it happened. Perhaps if I were in a car accident after living among humans for too long...that would be painful. Or maybe by another vampire, beheaded and burned...that too would be painful. Could I allow myself to grow old and die peacefully? All these things had filtered through my mind several times over the past eighty odd years. Now in a state of unconsciousness, or semi-unconsciousness, the thoughts are fluttering through my mind once again.

I can't concentrate on any one thing. The thoughts of death, pain, life...and Alice are a jumbled mix. All the other aspects of my life seem meaningless. The search for my promiscuous mother, the reason behind my 'hybrid type' condition and the point to my existence was meaningless. Alice...she was now in the focus of my mind. _She_ is all that matters. I can't feel my body. Am I already dead?

Alice loves me...she's near me. I swear I can feel her, smell her, hear her even. She has to be near me. If only I could get out of this fog. I feel like I can't move. Do I even have a body I can move? Yes I do. She's telling me I can wake up now. _Alice, Alice I can hear you._ Can she hear me? I'm trying but I can't move. I still can't feel my body. What's happening to me? I'm looking desperately to see her but all I can see is the white fog. Why can't I wake up? Is this heaven? I laugh to myself. Surely this is hell. I can hear, feel and smell my mate, my love...yet I can't see her unless it's a memory of her. Torture. I'm being tortured.

Is the fog clearing? I can see darkness now even though the fog surrounds it. I can hear voices. Alice is one of them but I can hear others. Am I coming back? I have to be waking up. It's dark...small white dots. Stars, right? I'm outside? I don't feel cold anymore. I actually feel quite warm. My entire body is warm. It's been a while since I've felt warm. It's nice. Odd but nice. Is it night? The sun has to be out because it's getting warmer. I can barely recall the feeling of a sunburn...it wasn't this bad was it? The burning is intensifying. Oh gods above it hurts. I can feel now but I still can't move. Something is on my face, cool and wet. Something is touching my paw. Paw? I phased. Oh what did I do? Did I hurt her...? _Alice... oh god Alice?!_ She's okay, she's here. I feel her touching my face. I sigh and realize I shouldn't have. The pain is splitting in my chest, like the slow beating heart that's within wants to tear itself out. This is enough! I have to get up now. How long have I been like this? Days...she's been sitting with me for two days now. I shudder; the heat is so intense it nearly feels cold. Part of me wonders if this is what the vampire transformation I heard about feels like. Alice didn't remember but from what she was told, it is. Wait... It's going. The pain is lessening. I can move my leg. It still hurts but the fog is receding. That's good that means I'm coming out of it. I'm coming back to Alice. I don't care about anything else. I don't care about any of it. Just let me out of this to be with her. I can't lose her...please.

My eyes open wider and I can see her. _Alice. Oh baby, I can see you!_ I plead to her with my eyes as she leans in, kissing my face. The pain in her eyes and the unshed tears wishing they could fall. "Oh Bella." She gasps and I hear footsteps coming quickly and I see Carlisle and the rest of the Cullen's rushing into the room. "Carlisle she's awake but she still can't move much."

"Alice she may be awake mentally but her body is still struggling to heal. She has to phase back. Her wolf form isn't healing as it should and it will cause her more pain when she's fully mobile." Carlisle knelt down beside us and looked into my eyes. "Bella, can you hear me?"

_Yes, I can hear you._ I said in my head and looked at Alice who relayed the message. _I don't know what to do; I feel almost frozen and can't move. I don't know how to phase back._ Again, Alice relayed the message to Carlisle.

"Bella, the last time you phased, with Alice at your side how did you will yourself to phase back?" He asked gently in a concerned voice. "Try to put yourself back to that if you can. We're here to help you but we need you to phase back. Your wolf form," He paused as he looked the length of my large brown body, "It's not well. You've sustained a lot of damage, tears, openly bleeding wounds that aren't healing like they should. I think that's why you can't move."

I glanced around at the vampires in the room and then focused on my Alice. _I guess lucky for me the wolf part of me stinks if I'm lying here in a bloody mess._ She let out a sad chuckle and retold my joke. A round of snorts and smiles greeted me. _Alice, I think I can do this. It's going to hurt like hell and I need you. But, I'd rather not have your entire family see me naked._ She grinned again and got the boys to leave us, allowing Esme & Rosalie to stay. Rosalie dashed away quickly and returned with a blanket and some clothes and then kneeled down to the rest of us and grabbed my right paw. Esme grabbed my left and Alice held my head in her lap and never let her gaze leave mine.

"I'm here baby, focus on me. I love you, Isabelle. I love you so much." Alice whispered to me in the softest most loving voice. I couldn't help but melt at her words. I was letting her love wash through me, just as I had before when I phased back. I was unconcerned with our company. I knew I was safe and even felt love coming from Esme and Rosalie. Looking back into the eyes that hold me captive I couldn't help but be a little sad at her darkened eyes. She never left my side once. She must be hungry. "Focus baby, I'm fine. I need you to be strong and come back to us."

I closed my eyes and concentrated on feeling her love. I concentrated on _their_ love. For the first time I truly felt I belonged and had a family. My heart smiled and I could feel Alice's happiness at my thoughts. Hands squeezed my paws and lips graced my forehead as I felt my body begin to tremble. I knew this was working, that I was beginning to phase back but it was excruciating. The open wounds still on my body were wreaking havoc on my concentration. I tried to take slow, deep breaths and just relax but once I began to shift back I couldn't hold back the howl the racked my body and turned into a blood curdling scream as I returned to my vampire form. I was panting with unneeded breath as I kept a death grip on the hands in my own and buried my face into Alice's lap. I had pulled my body into a fetal position, fully giving myself over to Alice's care. I felt the soft blanket be wrapped around us by Rosalie and a soft kiss pressed to my head by the other two females before they made their quiet exit leaving us alone.

"I'm...I'm so sorry, Alice." My broken whisper barely audible but she heard me. "Why can't I control it?"

"Shhh love. It's alright now. I will protect you. I figured something out these past two days that can help us with this but we'll talk about it later. Right now you need to get your strength back." She stroked my cheek gently and lowered her lips to mine. She pulled back and looked into my eyes. "You need to feed; it will help with your strength." I tightened my grip on her not wanting her to leave me. "I'm not going anywhere but I can get one of the others to get us something..."

"I just want to be with you right now. I just need you." I licked my dry lips and held on to her tightly. _Alice_...

_I know, Isabelle. We can satiate each other. You first, you need the strength otherwise I'll weaken you more than you already are._

I gazed into her eyes looking into nothing but love and acceptance. I scooted up into a sitting position and rested my head on her shoulder. I glanced at her neck and up to her eyes. She smiled at me and tilted her head.

_I love you, Alice._ I kissed the soft skin between her neck and shoulder gently before biting down and drinking in her love for me, feeling her strength and love course through me and warm my cold body. I gripped her tightly holding her against me. I could feel her relax into me and whimper softly. It wasn't a whimper of pain but of pleasure. I couldn't help the groan that escaped me as I pulled my teeth from her skin, licking my lips. I captured her lips with mine pushing her back onto the floor. I smiled as we kissed. She took everything I gave to her and returned it all full force. I moaned softly when she licked the inside of my top lip slowly removing the last traces of her blood from my mouth. _I'm so in love with you, Alice._

She smiled and cupped my neck softly, kissing me deeply. _And I'm so incredibly in love with you, Isabelle. _We stretched out on the floor, arms tightly around each other and legs entwined.

_You need to feed, Alice._ I could still see the darkness of her eyes and it wasn't from our arousal this time.

_Really baby, I'm okay. Just let me hold you for a while, let the blood strengthen you then I promise I will._

I smiled and held her tighter to me. I know there is a lot to talk about but right now all that matters is that we're together and we're both okay.

~_~_~_~

**Reviews are love. 3**


	19. AUTHORS NOTE 2

**Hey everyone,**

**I know it has been a ridiculously long time since I updated and I am terribly sorry about that. I just wanted to let you all know (as I've gotten several PM's) that I am *NOT* going to abandon this fic. I have had some serious writers block and some serious obsession with Call of Duty Modern Warfare 2 on my 360. No excuse, I know but it is what it is!**

**I am going to try and pull myself away from it tonight and I am off tomorrow so once I get the errands done I promise I will try to have you something to read. It may not be long but it will be something to hold you over until I can get the complicated chapter out of the way!**

**Thank you all for reading this, watching the fic, reviewing, etc. It really means a lot to me that so many of you are enjoying it. Take care!**

**~*~*~**

**Nick**


	20. Ch 16 Relive the Start

I am terribly sorry for the lack of updates. As I mentioned in my previous authors note, I am going to finish this! It may take some time so I just hope you all will still be enjoying it enough to continue!

* * *

~*~*~*~*~

* * *

**Ch 16- I Could Follow You to the Beginning, Just to Relive the Start**

**

* * *

**~*~*~*~

* * *

Four days.

That's what it's taken me to completely get my strength back and start feeling like me again. Shortly after I drank from Alice I could feel the pain subsiding but was replaced with an even stronger feeling of dread. What is happening to me? What is going to happen to me?

I was sluggish. I guess that is the best way to describe what I was feeling those first few days. My skin was cold and hard again but I was slow, weak and definitely not back on my game. I had no desire for the thrill of the speed of running. Hell I could barely walk. So weak was I that I couldn't even go with Alice to hunt. She refused my blood for fear of making me weaker. I knew she was right to do so, but I desperately craved that connection with her again. Instead Rosalie stayed with me.

I glanced across the open family room to where she was reading a book, sitting by the window. As if she felt my eyes on her she looked up from her book and smiled at me. Alice had only been gone a few hours yesterday to hunt with the guys but in that time Rosalie and I got to know each other better. As vile and down-right bitchy as she comes across, there is actually a much deeper part to her-one that she quite frankly never shows anyone but a select few. I was honoured to be considered as such. "Are you alright, Bella?" She whispered softly but I could hear her. My senses on this fourth day were back to normal but I still didn't feel inclined to jump up and flaunt it. I was happy in the quiet, trying to push aside what had happened and what it might mean.

"I'm fine, really." I smiled at her concern as she nodded and went back to the page she was on. Unfortunately our whispers were heard and Alice came rushing to my side.

"Bella, what's wrong?" She cupped my cheek and looked deeply into my eyes. "Are you in pain?" I could feel her pushing herself into my head, trying to figure out if I was truly okay.

_Ali, really I'm fine. I wouldn't lie or hide it from you if I wasn't. _I looked into her worried eyes and saw the panic slowly begin to fade. I smiled, "Rose caught me looking at her and was just checking on me."

Rosalie once again looked up and smirked, "Really Alice, she's fine. I felt her looking and thought maybe she needed something was all." She then closed her book, shook her head at us with a glint in her eyes and took off towards the garage.

"My strength is back. I feel completely back to my 'vampire' self." I stood up, stretched then turned to wrap Alice into my arms. She felt so good there. I sighed and pulled back to look at her. "If I'm honest, I think I was just too scared to actually resume all this madness with me. I'm seriously debating if it's worth it or not."

She frowned as she took in what I was saying. Lacing our fingers together she pulled me without a word up to Carlisle's office where he and Esme were.

* * *

"Isabelle honey how are you feeling?" Esme flitted over to my side and wrapped her arm around my shoulders.

"I feel good, physically at least." Off their glances I continued before Carlisle cut in, "As I mentioned to Alice I just don't know if my quest for answers is really worth it...I can't go through that again." I felt Alice shudder beside me and grip my hand tighter.

Carlisle stood and walked around to the front of his desk just a couple feet from us, "While I understand your concern Bella, and rightfully so, I think now more than ever we need to know what we're dealing with."

"I just..." I hesitated and blew out the air I wasn't using, "I just want to be with Alice...with you all as a part of this family. If I manage myself to stay away from the wolves and only around humans when need be for appearances I can maintain my vampire form and that is what I want. I do however understand if you ask me to leave...considering."

Three voices spoke at once disagreeing with my last sentence. "Please don't misunderstand. You are already a part of this family Bella. I just meant...granted you had been near the wolves at the time, but my concern comes from if it is only heightened by a close proximity to them. If you get too upset or angry, even miles away from them would the same result be expected? If you abstained from them for years...would it still happen?"

I froze...I hadn't gotten that far in my thinking. _Alice..._ She pulled my hand hard enough to make me face her.

_We need to talk Bella...come._ She nodded to Carlisle and Esme before jumping out his open office window and took off towards the woods.

I looked to their confused faces and shook my head slightly remembering what Alice had said a few days before about having an idea to look into. "I'm not entirely sure what that was about, but I think she has an idea. We need to talk, try and figure it out but then we'll share with the rest of you." I sighed and started for the window before stopping and turning back to them, "Thank you both...for everything. Thank you for welcoming me into your family." I bit my lip and smiled, "Thank you for being the parents I've always needed." With that I dove out the window to catch up with my raven haired beauty.

* * *

By the time I reached her she was already sitting atop one of the rocks we had made love near. I couldn't help the warmth I felt spread through my body just from looking at her sparkling in the sunlight. _Come join me, love._ She hadn't looked at me but knew I was there. I took two strides and made a small leap and landed softly beside her and sat down. I waited silently as she hadn't moved so much as an inch and was concentrating on the water slapping against the cliffs. I don't think she was actually seeing the water, but more through it. Her eyes blinked a moment later and she turned her full attention to me. Nuzzling her face with mine I couldn't help the soft giggle that came out before she claimed my lips in a slow and tender kiss.

"Now are you going to tell me what's going on inside that head of yours?" I asked softly, scooting closer to her and resting my hands on her thighs.

She nodded, "Bella do you remember when you felt yourself losing control? The white hot surge you felt as you took off away from us?"

I snorted, "Yes and I felt some panic and irritation that you were coming after me...I could have hurt you Alice, maybe even killed you!" I pressed my forehead against hers and closed my eyes, swallowing the non-existent bile I felt wanting to rise at the thought. _I'm a monster...I've killed before and you know I can't lose control near you..._

"Isabelle please look at me." I kept my head lowered, gritting my teeth. "Isabelle!" Alice snapped and my head shot up, having never heard that tone from her before directed at me. "Now that I have your attention you stop that train of thought right now. Just listen to me, please?"

"Okay, I'm listening, I'm sorry."

She sighed and I swear her lip twitched a bit wanting to smile before she continued on, "Okay where was I? Right, you taking off on me. Something happened in that second Bella. _To me_. I'm not sure how to describe it other than I knew I could help you. I think..." She paused, looking deeply into my eyes, "I think I could have stopped what happened to you."

I furrowed my brow, completely confused. "Alice...what do you mean you think you could have stopped what happened to me? You would have been-"

"NO. I take that back, I don't think. I **know** I could have stopped it. Something snapped in me Bella. It was more than just my overwhelming need to protect and care for you. I could hear you, but deeper than our link normally. My body was frozen but hot at the same time. I felt it coming on you even before your outburst. I was drawn to you and that's why I ran after you. There's something much deeper going on here baby. Something so much deeper than even our love, imprinting, mating, hearing each other's thoughts, feeding from one another... Bella I can sense the change coming in you and I think I'm the only thing that can stop it from happening!"

I sat frozen processing the information she had given me. She was standing now, pacing. That alone was very unusual for her...or for any vampire for that matter. "But Alice..."

"No buts, Bella. I'm serious about this. Sure you can lose your temper, get upset and phase on the fly because you lose control but think about it. Why else would I feel that? I know I can stop it when it happens. It's just..." she left her sentence hang.

"It's just what Ali?" I whispered, as if afraid of her answer. Part of me was.

She closed the distance between us, "You have to trust me. You have to trust that you won't hurt me."

I shook my head, "I can't trust myself when that happens. I can't hurt you...not like I did to her." I swallowed, not even able to say her name right now.

"And that's the problem. I know I can help you, stop this, work on the control but not until you realize that I am not her...and you are not the same person you once were. I know you loved her, and she loved you." She paused and I could tell she was choosing her words carefully. "You two were not meant to be together. We were. What happened then was meant to happen for a reason. It was beyond your control...and hers. But-"

Golden eyes were burning deep into mine as she placed her small hand over my heart. " But it's not beyond ours, Isabelle." She wrapped her arms around me and hugged me as if our lives depended on it.

And maybe they did.

~*~*~*~

* * *

Reviews are love! Thank you!!


	21. Ch 17 Terrifyingly Erotic

**A/N: Well, here's another chapter!! Luckily it didn't take as long as the last one lol. I really hope this came out well and you all enjoy it. Please let me know your thoughts. **** Enjoy!**

* * *

~*~*~*~

**CH 17 -Terrifyingly Erotic at the Wrong Time…**

**

* * *

  
**

.

"Okay wait, explain this to me again?" Jasper pressed with his brow furrowing. We had gathered with the family for Alice to explain what she felt and how she thought she could prevent my phasing.

"I can't get inside your head Jazz, but maybe since Edward can get into both of ours he can try and compare what you do with what I felt with Bella?" She replied and looked towards her lanky brother.

Edward nodded and you could tell he was in deep concentration as he listened to the thoughts racing through Alice's head. Her memories seemed to shock him as he turned his head quickly to Jasper. "Amazing…" He shook his head and quickly went around the room making eye contact with each of his family members. "The way she felt, the feelings inside her are that of what I see in Jasper when he's using his gift on us. Only, it only focuses on Bella." He glanced between Carlisle and Jasper as he explained, "It's like, with Jasper, when he's sensing others' emotions or sending out feelings of peace, calm, happiness…whatever they may be he can center it on one specific person or an entire group. However, with Alice, what she felt was nearly identical but was centered only on Bella and with a force I can't begin to comprehend. The best way to describe it is almost like tunnel vision, or when our senses hone in on our prey when we feed. We can still be aware of our surroundings but nothing is breaking through that concentration. That is what she felt with Bella."

Everyone was silent taking it all in. Jasper was looking between me and Alice and I knew he was feeling our emotions. I couldn't help but wonder what he felt coming from me towards her. _Love of course, but was it the nearly aching bliss I felt in my chest? Could he possibly feel I was walking a fine line between life and death with the intensity of what I felt for her?_

"That's exactly what he feels…yet despite how intense he feels it, it's still magnified ten fold for you both." Edward smiled at me and Alice tightened her grip on my hand.

"So since we've covered that Alice can sense it, feel Bella's phasing as it becomes close-how can that mean you can stop it?" Carlisle asked, directing the last part of his words to Alice.

Alice took a slow deliberate breath and exhaled. She looked toward Edward who nodded before she turned back to her father and mother's anxious expressions. "It's like I feel this power take over me. Almost like when I slip into my visions, but I'm still here, aware." She paused and I could tell she was getting frustrated with herself for being unable to accurately describe the sensation that took over her. "I feel protective but almost like I can calm her from the inside out?" She meant it as a statement but it came out as more of a question. "I just know that I can and that she won't hurt me. Anyone else though, there's no doubt that she'd still phase and potentially hurt someone." She looked at me sadly and I couldn't help but close my eyes.

"I can't be around anyone human…at least not for a while." I swallowed and looked to Carlisle and Esme, "Is there anything, a story perhaps that we could come up with…to give us some time to figure this out?"

"Of course. If you excuse us, Esme and I will talk in our office and figure out the most appropriate measures. We'll figure this out."

I glanced around the room at the warm yet worried expressions. "I know it seems I may be rash to a point. Maybe it's just strictly Alice related when I get upset or protective of her that causes my change, but just in case it has _anything_ at all to due with even the slightest temper issue, I don't want to take any chances being around humans."

They all nodded and voiced their agreements. "Hey on the bright side Bells, you can hang out with me and we can play video games together!!" Everyone groaned and Rose smacked Emmett in the back of his head. "What?!"

"Emmy, you do realize that if you beat her and she gets angry she could possibly phase right next to you and maul you to death right?" Rose smirked and winked at me letting me know she was only teasing. I had to smirk back and chuckle at Emmett's face.

"Oh…right. Maybe later then." Everyone laughed at his embarrassment but I had to give him a hug.

"Thanks buddy, I know you mean well. And really, I don't think you could beat me anyway but it's better to be safe than sorry, yeah?" I punched his arm gently.

"Oh it's ON like DONKEY KONG once your wolfy side is put away!" Again we all laughed and it felt good despite the underlying worry we all felt.

~*~*~*~

* * *

Carlisle and Esme had called and spoken with Karen about me accompanying them on a 2 week trip to Europe. Of course I had to stop in to say goodbye, get a hug and grab my things but Alice would be with me the entire time so I felt relatively calm and not so worried about hurting her. Spring break was next week so I would only be missing a few extra days of school. Not that I needed it.

"Isabella," Karen started as I was just about to walk out the door with Alice. I was afraid of this. "You do know that you can tell me anything, right? If there's…something going on?" She looked toward Alice and smiled softly, "I mean, obviously you two are serious."

I'm not sure how big my eyes were but it was apparent by Karen's giggle that they were very big. "You-"

"Yes I know, Bella." She smirked. That saucy old woman just smirked at me! I could feel myself wanting to blush, almost feeling my face warm. "If I may say so, I think you two make a beautiful couple. I can see the love that shines in both your eyes for each other."

I smiled and turned to Alice, lacing her fingers with my own. "Thank you," I whispered looking back at Karen, "I wasn't sure how you would react."

Karen walked up to us and wrapped me in a tight hug. I felt her shiver slightly but she never commented or pulled away like I thought she might. "Isabelle-a" I froze. _Alice did she just?_

_Yeah, she did…_ Alice wrapped her arm around my waist and brushed her fingers along my side in a calming motion.

"I don't want to make you two uncomfortable but you must know that this old girl knows a lot of things. And those things I don't know, I still have an idea about. I know your family is good, Alice. I don't doubt that for a second. However, you both need to look out for one another. There are others in this area that won't let some things go." She hugged us each once and stepped back. "Now get out of here. Just don't forget to call me to check in, or stop in for a visit once in a while."

I nodded my head, "It's just two weeks, Karen." I smiled but seeing her serious look my smile faltered.

"You belong with her, Bella. I know this and I know you are more than able to care for each other." She smiled but I could see the tears in her eyes. "Now, I have things to cook for a bake sale so get out of my house." She shooed us with a smile.

"Thank you, Karen. I will take care of her. I swear it." Alice whispered softly before turning to walk out the door pulling me by the hand.

"See you soon." I smiled and followed behind Alice like a lovesick puppy.

_Come on girl, let's go home!_

A growl rumbled in my chest but I couldn't help but smirk. _You are so in for it, Tinkerbell! _

~*~*~*~

* * *

We laughed and chased each other around in the woods on the way back to the Cullen's place. We were probably a mile out when I got a whiff of them and felt my skin start to tingle. _Ali…_

_I know, I smell them now too._ Alice slowed to a stop with me as we laced fingers. _How you feeling?_

I shook my head and concentrated on taking slow breaths. My skin was tingling but it didn't feel unbearable or out of my control. Alice nodded and I knew she understood. _What should we-_ I didn't get the chance to finish my thought as Rosalie came running up to us.

"Alice, Bella…" she hesitated and I almost wanted to laugh. Almost. "The wolves are near the house talking with Carlisle. Edward and Jasper stayed to listen to their thoughts and control any anger from them and well, Emmett is just looking for a fight." I noticed that she had a small smile tugging at her lips. She didn't seem too concerned and that relieved me a little.

"What do they want?" I couldn't help but ask. "They aren't looking to fight though, are they?"

Rose shook her head, "No I don't think so. Edward sent me to locate you two before you got too close. Although if he can hear your thoughts from here I'm sure the wolves can smell you now that they have your scent." She licked her lips, "Jacob is there…he seems calmer, more reasonable now. As reasonable as a mutt can be I suppose. They are still wanting to talk with you."

I looked to Alice and she gave me a reassuring wink. _You'll be fine. I can do this, I can protect you. Trust me._

_With my life._ I turned back to Rose and nodded, "Well, let's go see what's happening." We took off in a slow run for us, cautious of any sounds around us. We had just neared the tree line at the edge of the Cullen's lawn when we heard them. The voices weren't raised or particularly loud but enough so that we could hear the debate.

"Look, the bottom line is she should have belonged with us. Now that's she's imprinted on your _daughter_ that makes things a little difficult. Regardless, I don't want to force her to do anything but I think she should hear us out, listen to our legends and decide for herself afterwards." I recognized Jacob's voice before I noticed him. He was flanked by two other very large guys in shorts, and three wolves behind them. I glanced off into the trees beyond them and knew there were at least three more pacing.

"I think it's clear that Bella made her choice. She and Alice are in love and do not wish to be separated, for any reason or length of time." Carlisle countered in a soothing voice. "Of course she is free to make her own choices but the last time you were here and she phased it nearly killed her." I felt my heart swell slightly when I heard the pain in Carlisle's voice. _He cares about me._

_We all do, beautiful. _Alice smiled at me and I felt Rose's hand on my back for comfort.

"All the more reason she should spend some time with us, try to learn to control it before deciding which path she'd rather take." Jacob crossed his arms as Jasper and Edward grit their teeth.

"Do you not listen? Even if she _wanted_ to embrace the wolf part of her, they are _**mates**_. She can't be one or the other and even if it were possible your treaty would keep them apart! Either way it would be unbearable for her." Jasper exclaimed and I could see the tension in the set of his shoulders.

Jacob snickered with the other two while the wolves all grumbled in a low growl. It was evident this was going to go nowhere but bad. I felt my skin begin to burn and the red haze began to filter into the corner of my eyes. _Who were they to try and take control of my life? To make MY decisions for me?_ My skin began to tingle and Rose let out a quiet gasp as my skin started to get warm.

"Come on Bella, come out here. I could smell you 10 minutes ago!" Jacob called in a teasing voice much to the annoyance of seven angry vampires that let out a low hiss.

I stood up with Alice glued to left and Rose on my right to cross the short distance and stop beside our family. "There is no reason for you to still be here we've already gone through this." I whispered through my gritted teeth.

"Look, I know some of what we know would mean a lot to you. Maybe it would even help with this" Jacob sighed and waved his hand between the wolves and my new family, "problem."

"Problem?" I sneered at him. "There wasn't a _problem_ until you started making one." I said lowly trying like hell to keep control of the warring beasts within me. "How cruel are you? Why hang information for me over my head in order to get me into your little pack?"

Jacob's face softened for the first time and his glance left mind to stare at his bare feet. "Look, I don't want to try and force you to do anything but I do have obligations…and orders from the tribal council members."

"What kind of orders?" Alice whispered and kept her hand on my lower back.

Jacob scratched the back of his neck and turned to glance at the taller male to his right. The guy shook his head but Jacob just shrugged. "They want you to meet with them. They want all the details of your life and the details of it now as things have obviously changed with you imprinting on a leech. But more than that, they want to see the wolf part of you for themselves."

"So in other words they want my _death?_!" I screeched and knew I had just lost the last bit of control I had clung to. My vision went red, my body shuddered and I could feel my body wanting to shift. I could barely register that Alice had shoved Rosalie towards the family, yanked me back and pulled me tightly against her front as both arms came up to cross my chest and my stomach. Her right hand was perfectly over the spot that held my heart and her face was pressed into the back of my neck and shoulder. _Alice…_ I whimpered out with my mind as the tremble in my body got worse.

_Trust me, Isabelle. Listen to me closely and do exactly as I say._ She squeezed me tighter as if to emphasize her point.

_I can't…I'm losing it, I can't hurt you…please._ I felt my heart plummet. I trusted Alice with my life but I didn't trust myself with hers.

_Stop fighting me, Bella! Just feel me, forget everyone and everything else and just feel me. _She pressed a kiss to my shoulder and laid her head back down as her left hand gently squeezed and rubbed my stomach and side. Her right hand never strayed from my heart. _I know what you feel, I feel it too. Your body wants to explode into it's other form but we can't let that happen baby, we can't. But you still have to get it out of your system. _I was trying so hard to concentrate on her but I was terrified and it was hard. _I know you're scared but __**trust **__me. Push all that anger, the rage, the hopelessness that you feel into me._ I gasped and grit my teeth. _Don't you dare try and hold it in. Push it out, Bella. Project it onto me. PLEASE!!_

The tremors had gotten worse and I felt myself losing grip. In a last ditch effort I surrendered my entire being over to her. I gave her everything until I had nothing left in me to give. It was at that precise moment I felt my knees buckle and all the weight wash through me until I was on my knees on the ground with Alice still holding me tightly. I felt completely exhausted but the fire was out. I was still me. I didn't phase. I had just begun to turn my drained head to exclaim "you did it!" to my soul mate but was caught short by the feral look in her eyes that was glued on the wolf pack. Her eyes were pitch black with barely a streak of red in them and her body was vibrating with rage. She was the most terrifying yet amazingly erotic site I had ever seen.

Alice lowered herself into a crouch and I could hear the growl building within her chest that by the time it reached her throat sounded more like a vicious snarl.

The snarl of an attacking wolf.

* * *

~*~*~*~*~

Reviews are LOVE!!!


	22. Ch 18 A Form of Release

**A/N: No I don't own Twilight or any of the characters. Oh woe is me. lol**

**

* * *

** Okay first I want to say I am SO sorry. I know this is ridiculously late...and this is a ridiculously short chapter. However, the next part has to be a chapter of its own. And you'll see why. Soon. LOL Lets just say 95 % of the next bit is all BELLICE...and hopefully a little bit of comedy on the side.

Let me know what you think, and again I'm so sorry for the time between (short) updates!

.

.

* * *

**CH 18 A Form of Release**

* * *

.

.

I don't know who was more shocked, us or the wolves. Alice was literally shaking in anger. It shouldn't be possible but I could swear I felt heat rolling off her of. I think subconsciously we were all holding our breaths for what felt like minutes but was only a matter of seconds. Not wanting to startle her into an attack I held completely still and glared towards Jacob, trying to convey with my eyes not for any of them to do anything but breathe. And that may have been pushing it.

_Alice..._ I tried in my mind but she didn't budge. She was still in a crouch, still trembling and still very much growling. Her eyes hadn't so much as flickered away from the wolves just a short few yards from us. In the few seconds I was trying to reach out to her with my thoughts, I couldn't help but hear our family in the background.

"Don't...don't move Jasper." I could hear Edwards voice speaking softly. Out of the corner of my eyes I could see Jasper's lean form shaking and he was beginning to shrink into a defensive crouch. "Jasper..."

"I'm sorry...there's so much, I can't stop." Jasper whispered pained through his teeth. I knew the emotions coming off Alice were affecting him ten-fold compared to the rest of us. He was way more sensitive to the emotions of others, but especially that of his sister.

"Rose...very slowly make your way behind me." I whispered without turning my head towards her. "Ali, baby...Rose is coming over, don't be alarmed...just stay here by me. Please." I spoke softly to her, knowing that if she couldn't respond mentally that perhaps she could still hear me. Rose made her way behind me at slower than a human's pace and held her breath. Alice still hadn't budged so much as an inch but when Rose slowly reached out to grab my hand in support, I felt as much as saw her eyes flicker downwards and I wasn't shocked when the snarl took on a sharper edge. She was jealous. "Alice... it's just Rose. Our friend. Our sister. I'm yours Alice. Only yours, love." Although to a human's eyes the change wasn't noticeable, I could tell she was still with me. "That's right, all yours Tink." I stretched my hand out the short gap between us and laced my hand with hers. She didn't look away but her hand did grip mine forcefully. "Rose is going to come around to your left side, Alice." I then felt Rose walk behind Alice and come to rest at her left side and she too laced her hand with Alice's.

I tried again, to communicate with her mentally but had no luck. She wasn't responding to me at all. "Edward," I spoke evenly, "can you tell me what's going on in this beautiful head next to me?" I was trying to keep things light and calm for not only Alice but the trembling wolves in front of us.

Edward frowned as he was concentrating on Alice. "There's no rational thought, Bella. It's a fury of single words and feelings rushing at her all at once. Is there something specific you're looking for?" He spoke calmly and flickered his eyes to meet mine.

"What's the primary word or feeling besides the rage and anger?" I asked and squeezed Alice's hand harder, stroking her soft skin with my thumb. I noticed Rose was doing the same.

Edward smirked just a tiny bit before replying, "Isabelle, mine, defend and claim." I couldn't help but smirk a bit despite the situation.

"This isn't a time to laugh and smile!" Jacob exclaimed though not very loudly. It was loud enough though. Alice's frame began to lean forward but before she could lunge I stepped in front of her, not letting her break eye contact with me once her eyes met mine.

"Jacob, I think it's best you and your pack stay as still as possible right now. If she attacks, you have the right to defend your pack, but don't be mistaken as to think we'll let her fight you alone. Regardless of who is at fault." Emmett's deep voice spoke calmly and rationally. I think that was a first.

_Alice. _Nothing. _Alicat?_ Her eyes lightened, if only marginally. _That's right baby. Focus on me. Forget everything and everyone else. I love you, Alice. I need you baby. Please, snap out of this. Come back to me._ I could see the venom welling up in her eyes. She wanted to come back to me...but she couldn't.

"Bella." Jasper spoke, again through clenched teeth, "She needs to expend the energy otherwise she can't stop. There's only two ways...one of which is to attack."

"And the other?" Jacob sneered.

"The second most powerful drive a vampire has." Esme whispered quietly.

"What to drink our blood?" Another of the pack members asked.

Rose scoffed and rolled her eyes. "No you mutt, to mate. Or in Alice's case, to love."

The pack all snorted and Jacob was the one to roll his eyes this time. "Oh that's rich, you're telling me leeches can love?! Don't you mean feed on humans and get off on it?"

Alice lunged but with me standing in front of her and Rose holding her from behind she only managed to push me back three feet before we stopped her. It was at the same moment that Jasper hit his knees and was holding his arms across his stomach as if holding himself together. "Bella, you have to get through to her...get her away from here. Jasper's close to losing it and if he's close, Alice must be closer." Edward warned.

My gaze hadn't left the black eyes of my lover. "Alright Alice...we have to go. Can you hear me baby? Squeeze my hand." I spoke softly and rubbed her hand harder. "Alice. Alice!" She still wasn't responding to me. _How many ways can we do this baby? You have to let me in. I need you Alice. Come back to me. _Nothing. _Alice!! _Her eyes flickered, but just barely. That slight twitch of her eyes was enough to let me know she was fighting it. _Alice I need you...please. Get me out of here baby. I'm yours, Alice. Now I want you to prove it. Do you hear me? I love you and I need you. Claim me Alice. Prove to me that I'm yours. Prove to me...that you __**own**__ me._

It was then she growled once again. Only this time, it wasn't the sound of anger and a signal of attack. It was the sound of a very turned on vampire. The black of her eyes smoldered into a deep gold with only a small ring of the darkness left. Her grip on my hand and Rose's dropped. Before I had a second to respond I was off my feet in the arms of my lithe soul mate as she ran faster that I had ever seen even with the extra weight she was carrying. I knew exactly where we were headed. The one place we always ended up; our rock cliff near the beach. I held tightly to her neck, pressing my nose against her and breathing in her scent. I smiled as I knew exactly what I was in for.

_I hope you can handle it._ She thought to me, almost smugly.

My face broke out into huge grin. _Bring it on, baby._

_._

_.  
_

_

* * *

_

.

.

See, short right? I'm sorry. For all you smut lovers... hopefully the next update will make up for it! :D

Thanks for reading!


	23. Ch 19 I Think Rosalie Should Go

**A/N: Thank you guys for all the amazing feedback. You have no idea how much it means to me!!**

**I'm terribly sorry about the time between updates and the fact that they are kinda short when they do come. Anyway, hope you enjoy this! :D**

~-~-~-~-~-~

~-~-~-~

* * *

**CH 19 "I Think Rosalie Should Go"**

**

* * *

  
**

~-~-~-~

Emmett's booming laugh sounded for the sixth time in the last hour. It was amusing sure, but he was getting almost too big of a kick out if. I couldn't help but chuck my book at him, effectively cutting off his laugh and receiving a playful glare. "What?!"

"Enough already, I was trying to read." I huffed and stood up to walk over and retrieve my book when he grabbed me and pulled me down on the couch beside him.

"Like you could concentrate anyway! Listen to that!" He laughed again as another ear splitting thunderous crack was heard. Of course, it wasn't really ear splitting to us, but the humans are probably wondering when the rainstorm was going to hit.

"How long has it been?" I asked although I was pretty sure I already knew.

Jasper rounded the corner with a smirk on his face, "Going on four hours."

"That's nothing, is it Rosie?" Emmett smirked and squeezed my side. I had to roll my eyes but still felt a little smile tug at my lips. Yes so I was smug. "That's my girl."

"Granted it's only a couple miles away, and sound carries, but I can still feel their emotions." Jasper stated as Edward came walking back into the family room. They exchanged a strange glance and I shuddered. I so didn't want to know.

"It's only normal and we've all been there...and still go there." Esme giggled and wrapped her arm around her husband's.

"Esme's right. And given their bond and the fact that Alice was right...it's that much more potent. She said she could stop Bella from phasing and she certainly did. I just hope that if it happens much more it gets easier for her to control. Or, at the very least, this outlet proves effective and she doesn't lose control." Carlisle spoke softly, more to himself than the rest of us it seemed.

"Oh I think she's losing control alright!" That's my husband, forever the horny young man. "Wait...it's been what, eight minutes? Maybe they're done?" He chuckled again.

"I think if they are back to themselves now someone should go check on them. Just to make sure they are both okay and that Alice doesn't have any side effects to what took place." Edward finally spoke. It went deadly quiet and that's when I noticed all eyes were fixed on me. "I think it should be Rosalie." I've never wanted to smack him more.

"Oh no. No way!" I stood up and crossed my arms. Emmett had an almost wondrous look on his face. I could only imagine where his mind was. "Why me?!" I screeched and Emmett cringed. Good.

"Well strictly to play the devil's advocate..." Carlisle started but hesitated when my glare fixed on him. Sensing I wasn't going to reply he continued, "Edward would be stuck hearing their thoughts which could be altogether unpleasant for him...they are his sisters after all. And Jasper would still be feeling their emotions. Right now, Alice alone could overpower his senses, let alone adding Bella into the mix."

"Fine, what about Emmett" I stopped when he smirked, "you or Esme?" I put my hands on my hips as I waited for his reply. I knew I had already lost but couldn't dare show them I knew that.

"Well..." he paused again, "You see, Esme and I are parental figures." He didn't need to elaborate, I understood. "And Emmett, well he's a guy. He may not read minds or feel emotions but they would still be more welcoming to another female. Wouldn't you agree?" He spoke and smiled softly.

I couldn't help but huff and run my fingers through my blonde hair. I hated losing. I loved my sisters but I really didn't need to experience what they were doing. No matter how intrigued by it I might be. I shot a glare to Edward making sure he made no sound or face as I knew he had heard my last thought.

"Fine, whatever." I turned on my heel and dashed up the stairs. I knew better than to approach them without extra clothes. They would have shredded what they were wearing and I didn't fancy checking on them only to 'talk' to them in their bare forms. After I grabbed what they would need I jumped out the window, avoiding the rest of the family and headed towards the Cliffside. It had been quiet during and since our talk so I was hoping the worst was over. I nearly stopped in my tracks when their orgasmic screams pierced the quiet. I heard them all laughing behind me as I entered the trees and I couldn't stop myself from letting loose a snarl. They were going to pay for this.

* * *

~-~-~-~-~-

* * *

My back smashed into the jagged rock behind me and I couldn't help but whimper. All I could see, feel, smell and taste was Alice. I had no idea how long we had been making love, claiming each other over and over but no matter how long it was, it would never be long enough.

_Alice...oh god._ My naked body was raised up off the ground with my back still firmly against the rocks. Alice had manoeuvred us so that my legs were over her shoulders and her face was right where I wanted her. I had one hand gripping and tugging hard at her messy black hair while the other hand was digging into the rocks at my side. She was relentless and I loved it. Her delicate hands had cupped my breasts, tweaking my nipples to the point of almost being painful. It was delicious. Using what little leverage I had I rocked my hips roughly against her face as her tongue explored inside me.

I groaned in disappointment when she pulled her head back from me. I could barely focus but I could make out the evil glint in her still blackened eyes. She leaned in torturously slow and flicked her tongue softly over my clit. It was maddening.

_Alice...don't tease me. TAKE ME._ She grinned again, and repeated the movement. I started to raise up just enough to get the top part of my back off the boulder but was pleasantly surprised when she thrust two fingers roughly into me and slammed me back into place. The sound was loud and if I didn't know better I'd say the ground was shaking with the force of it. _Oh fuck..._

_My my my Isabelle. What language on such a fine lady!_ She scolded me as she pumped into me. I never would have guessed she had this dominating side to her, but I loved every bit of it. Anything she could give I would take. I knew she would be the same. _You got that right. _It was almost evil, how she'd tease and play along with her words in my head as she added another finger filling me more. I whimpered and rocked my hips meeting her thrusts. My fingers were sinking into the rocks creating perfect holes in them. How I wished they were deep inside Alice.

Alice growled and pulled me down to the ground and straddled me. Lacing our fingers together she pinned my hands over my head as she slowly started to grind our sopping pussies together. _Ali... harder._ She sped up her movement slightly and rocked harder against me as she claimed my mouth, forcing her tongue inside. She tasted like me, I noticed, as I sucked her tongue making her groan. As soon as the idea crossed my mind, Alice was making it happen. She turned her body around and presented me with the most delicious desert. _Alice_.

I gripped her hips forcefully and pulled her down against my mouth. She was so hot and wet. She was already dripping on my lips before I got a chance to suck. I slowly ran my tongue up and down her slit, around and slightly in then back out. Her hips pressed down harder and I grinned, so thankful that I didn't need to breathe anymore. Gripping her firm ass in my hands I tilted my head enough to shove my tongue in as deeply and as hard as I could. Flicking inside her I felt her tremble and try to keep pace on me but I could tell I was distracting her.

_Isabelle...what...I...GOD!_ I groaned against her as she sucked my clit, again pushing three fingers deep into me. A few thrusts more with my tongue and I copied her, paying strict attention to her tight bundle of nerves as I pounded my fingers into her tight hole. I knew it the moment we were both teetered on the edge, it was then both our thoughts went to the same place. It was as if we were compelled, both at the same exact time, our lips released our prisoners only to bare our teeth and sink into the smooth hard flesh on the back of each others' thighs. Our bodies shook, erotic pleasure coursing through us as we drank from each other. Only moments later we both pulled back just enough to scream.

Alice propped herself up and turned to lay down on me. She smiled at me and captured my lips in delicate kiss full of love. When I opened my eyes once again I could see the honey gold of her eyes and the bright red flecks shining back at me.

_Welcome back baby._

~-~-~-~-~-~

* * *

Comments?


	24. Ch 20 Maintaining the BeastAnd Rosalie

**A/N: Okay guys, I have to say I am so, so, so sorry for the lack of updates on this fic. I have had some serious writers block. I have chapters worked out in my head...but they are further down the line. So I am stuck trying to figure out the next few before I get to that point. **

**I also want to apologize for the shortness of this chapter. This was something I was toying with, not sure if I wanted to include it or not but thought, hey it's better than nothing, right?!**

**Please bare with me and stick with it if you enjoy it. I promise not to disappoint. And hey....good things come to those who wait. *smirks***

**.**

**.  
**

* * *

**CH 20 Maintaining the Beast...and Rosalie**

.

I was nearing the cliff so I slowed down to a human pace and walked quietly. I was hoping beyond hope that Alice and Bella were now finished and could sense me approaching. As I rounded the last turn in the trees that lead me to the open area I knew to find them in I hesitated. _What if they're nude?_ I rolled my eyes at myself. _Of course they're nude, Rosalie. How often do you have sex with Emmett with your clothes on?_ I chastised myself. Taking a slow and unnecessary breath I stepped past the trees and immediately spotted them. Alice was sitting in Bella's lap, her legs around the brunette's waist and they were kissing softly. I couldn't help but smile. After all these years I was happy that Alice had found her mate. And Bella, well she was one of a kind and I couldn't help but like her instantly. Other than Alice and Esme it had been so long since I had had a friend. _A very gorgeous friend_. I shook my head. _What is wrong with me?_

.

Now don't get me wrong. It's not like I had never had the company of a woman. Our kind, despite having mates and being very loyal, we do enjoy another's company now and again. We live forever and that gives you a lot of time to think, reflect, and share yourself with others without the fear if petty human jealousy. It's never a secret, hidden affair. Both partners are aware and consenting. I had shared company with Jasper before, and Emmett had shared company with a young newborn redhead nomad we met in passing. I know the others had as well, but we don't pry into each others' business. But what I couldn't understand was why I had suddenly taken an interest in Bella. I wanted her friendship of course, and I had always found Alice quite eye pleasing but never approached her. I knew she was saving her first time for her mate and I would never do anything to jeopardize that. _But now that she had her mate...Stop it!_ I shook my head again and stepped forward as both pair of eyes landed on mine.

.

I didn't move except to toss them the duffle bag. "I brought you both some clothing." I smirked at them, "I didn't suspect anything you had on before would have survived."

.

It's cute to see two vampires who can't blush, get an embarrassed yet satisfied look on their faces. Bella would have been three shades of red had she been able to blush.

.

"Thank you, Rose." Alice spoke up and then arched her eyebrow at me.

.

"Oh, right. Sorry." I said and turned my back to them. It would be me blushing now if that were possible. I could make out the sounds of them dressing and turned around only when I heard a quiet 'ok' from Bella. "I'm sorry, I was just...they voted me to come check on you." I finally got out.

.

Bella smiled at me and walked toward me, "Thank you, Rosalie." She hugged me then and I hugged her back briefly before closing my eyes tightly. The scent of her and Alice's lovemaking was assaulting my senses so much that I had to hold back a growl. I stepped back from the hug to find Alice at my side staring at me.

.

"Rose?" She looked at me questioningly. I shook my head and cleared my throat, smiling slightly. "Rosalie Lillian Hale." My head snapped up and my eyes met her hardened gaze. I saw her eyes widen slightly and I again lowered my eyes. _I have got to stop this!_

.

"Alice?" Bella questioned and laced her fingers with my sister's. I could feel her gaze on me and then back to Alice. I knew they were communicating silently.

.

"Look, I need to get back. I need to hunt. See you at home." I meant it as a statement but it came out as more of a question. I turned on my heel to sprint off when two hands caught my arm and halted my movement.

.

I sighed and turned back to see a small smirk on Alice's face and upon feeling a soft rubbing I looked down to see Bella rubbing her thumb along the outside of my hand. I met her eyes and what I saw there could only be described as mischievous. "Don't rush off Rose. We can go back together."

.

"Rose, I'm flattered, really. I've seen you over the years looking at me. I've gotten visions of your decisions to approach me and then change your mind out of respect for me and I appreciate that. I truly do." She turned to look at Bella for a short moment before looking back to me with a smile on her face, "We're not saying no..." she started and stepped right up to me and tilted her head up to kiss my cheek, "I'm just saying I'm not ready to share my mate just yet." Despite the temperature of my body I felt as if my entire being flushed with heat. Remember what I said about blushing? Well I can still feel as if I do.

.

It was then that Bella slid her hand up my arm to slide her fingers into my blonde hair. I closed my eyes and tightened my grip on Alice's hand. "Good things come to those who wait." I swallowed and I swallowed hard at Bella's whispered words in my ear before I felt her lips softly press against my neck and her hand trail back down the same path it followed up.

.

"I uh." I stuttered. Rosalie Hale does not stutter. I could feel their smirks and shook my head, letting out a small laugh. "Well now that I am affectively embarrassed shall we head back? I'm sure Carlisle is dying to question you both on what happened. Obviously Alice stopped you from phasing, and you were able to provide her an...outlet for the rage to bring her back to us." It was then they both averted my gaze and I grinned.

.

"Yes, it seems Alice was right. She was able to prevent my phase and I was able to work out the kinks. So to speak." She grinned and I couldn't help but smile back.

.

"It'll be fun trying to watch Carlisle figure this one out." Alice mused as we made our way back to the house. "And even more fun seeing him squirm when we skirt over the details of how Bella was able to bring me down from my 'wolf high'."

.

Together the three of us made a short detour to hunt before heading back into the house. The looks on the guys faces when we came in was priceless. You would have thought they overheard the three of us in an orgy or something.

.

"No, not yet anyway." Edward smirked at me after pulling his gaze away from Alice. Guessing he heard her thoughts I glared at him and made my way over to my husband who was grinning like a kid at the zoo. No doubt Jasper and Edward had been filling his head. "Of course we did." Edward answered my thought.

.

"Perfect." I mumbled and grabbed his hand as we darted upstairs to our room. I was in for a long night. I grinned.

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**So there it is. Hope you all enjoy! :D**

**.**

**.  
**


	25. OMG Author's Note

Wow, okay so...

I can see that everyone is HATING this last update and the idea of a 3way with our three leading ladies. Before everyone starts stoning me can I please just clarify one point.

TIME to vampires doesn't have the same meaning as it does to us.

What do I mean by that? Vampires are practically immortal. They can live forever. Years to vampires pass like weeks for us. Time doesn't have the same meaning. So just because Bella and Alice are willing in the future doesn't mean it's going to be next week or next month, or hell, even next YEAR. They have forever. It's just an open-ended invitation for if and when the time does come.

Everyone is suddenly freaking out now. I'm not going to ruin my Alice/Bella dynamic. Trust me. I hadn't even planned to get into THAT part of their possible 3some in this story lol. So please, everyone take a deep breath and just calm down.

This story is, and will forever be BELLICE only. I'm simply playing the devil's advocate for Rose. She's not all prim and proper as she comes off. She has her wild side and a very sexual side that she doesn't mind sharing with people she's close with. So I'm giving you food for thought of some time in their never-ending future of what might take place with them. It's not right now, in the next update, or even going to be in this story.

Clear as mud now? Lol Really, the idea entertains me and I'll probably write another fic just to get it out, but it won't be in this one.

~Nickole


	26. CH 21 Calm Before the Storm

**A/N: Hello wonderful people. I am sincerely sorry for the lack of updates and the ridiculous time between each one. I'm not a 'driven writer' by trade and it's rare I find the inspiration to do so. Top that with the fact that I've started on a new fic that the idea for just wouldn't go away and it's been hard. And no, I haven't posted it and won't until it's finished. Lol I don't want to end up in the same boat with the crazy time between updates. I will post it once it's completed that way I can guarantee you an update each week or maybe two a week until the final one is posted.**

**I want to send out a special shout out to a few amazing people: _Breathe4her_, my wife, my inspiration. She is the 'driven writer' by trade. She has a crazy number of fics on the go you will love if you check them out. _Hphglover_, Liz, you are awesome. Thank you for introducing me to your story _To Love You More_. For those of you who haven't, check it out. It's a beautiful love story. _Eden Storm_, your story _Mesmeric Stranger_ is fantastic. I love getting myself lost in your world. And of course there are countless others I love and adore but this a/n is crazy long at this point. You all know who you are, I gush on your reviews. lol**

**Anyway, without further ado, here is chapter 21. Things are starting to heat up.**

**.**

**.  
**

**CH 21 Calm Before the Storm**

.

.

It has been two months since we experienced that Alice could stop me from phasing when I was beyond able to control myself. After much discussion with Carlisle and the rest of the family we had come to the conclusion it was another part of the intense connection Alice and I share. Between choosing each other as mates, the wolf part of me that imprinted on her and the physical bonding it wasn't that much of a stretch that she would be the balancing part of me.

With Carlisle's help we were able to have a mature and diplomatic conversation with the elders of the Quileute pack. I really wanted to laugh at the absurdity of it all but with Alice in my head she was there to chastise me into keeping my laughter at bay throughout the meeting. Imagine the look of eight vampires, eight werewolves and four human tribesmen sitting around a bonfire. Of course the wolves and the council were on their side of the treaty line and we were on ours, which made it that much more comical to me. I kept waiting for the 'peace pipe' to be passed around. That thought got me an elbow to the side and I could hear Alice's giggling in my mind.

I don't know where my seriousness in this matter was that night but I was on a permanent Alice high and nothing could overthrow that.

The meeting was a final decision that I had chosen my path, or my side, if you will. Although I had no ill will towards them and since we were all animal and not human drinkers we would work together towards any red eyes that came into our respective areas. This also opened up the issue of my uncontrollable phasing.

For the last six weeks they had been testing me. The rest of our family and the pack would stay far enough back not to interfere, while myself, Alice, Sam and Jacob were in the centre. Essentially the best tactic they found were to threaten us, or more so, Alice to tap into my need to defend my mate. Effectively causing me to get so angry the phase was upon me, leaving Alice to work on calming me down.

The first few times, just as the first, the rage passed over into Alice and of course, we had to excuse ourselves. Not that we minded. I smirked at the thought, no of course we didn't mind. But since then it was getting easier and easier for us to control how much was passed into her to the point that it was tolerable for both of us. After much practice we were able to gauge how much to give and receive from each other without either of us suffering the negative effects. In fact, with this control we could each empower the other in battle if need be. It was just another weapon in our arsenal that would come in handy.

A few members of the pack had been leery of this knowledge at first, feeling that if we 'strayed' from our animal drinking ways it would give us an advantage over them. However after much more debate and discussion, I feel the worst with that is behind us. It was then we moved onto my existence in the first place.

The pack and elders both confirmed that one of their own had admitted to being with my mother. Quinson Blackhawk was his name, and he was 1/3 my father. Jerry Springer anyone? The Blackhawk line we found out was now just the Blacks. This knowledge alerted me to the fact that Jacob, now the Alpha of the pack was a relative of mine. I wanted to laugh. That boy was essentially my stepbrother.

Unfortunately none of the pack knew what came of my mother when she ran off with her vampire lover. No one had seen or heard from her since. There were, however, sightings of my vampire side of the gene pool through the years. Almost as if he were looking for something.

.

.

Was he looking for me? But if that's the case, he would have had to of known about me...that I wasn't all human. Was that the point?

**_Is that what you're thinking love?_** I turned, glancing behind me and smiled softly when my eyes met hers. She came and sat beside me and leaned against the large oak I was resting against. "You've been out here for a while." She spoke softly, leaning her head against my shoulder.

I nodded and sighed, wrapping my arm around her and kissing the top of her messy black hair.

"That's all I can come up with which opens up a whole knew can of worry." She nodded and I could tell she was thinking so I was content to sit in silence until she spoke again. I didn't wait long.

"Let's say that's true. That means he either somehow learned you weren't just human and came looking," she paused, "or that he had hoped this is what would happen."

I stiffened against her. Somehow in the back of my mind I knew I was working towards the same conclusion she was but I hadn't just accepted it and brought it to the front.

"You mean to say he was trying to get my mother to conceive: perhaps for a crossbreed of human and vampire." I spoke softly knowing she would hear every word whether I said it or just thought it.

"I'm guessing he had no idea it would be more than a simple crossbreed. Until Carlisle mentioned it being possible for a male vampire to mate with a human and her to conceive, I would have never known. So the odds of that working, as well as the seed of a werewolf infusing to create a child...that's just inconceivable." Alice looked completely flabbergasted.

"And for my mother to live through the birth, that I didn't kill her while growing within her," I trailed off, closing my eyes.

"Hey now." She sat up and straddled my waist, lifting my chin and making me focus on her gorgeous red-golden eyes. "We know how that's possible. You're like a chameleon, Isabelle. You can change and adapt to whatever environment you're surrounded with. In the case of your birth, you grew within her as the bouncing baby girl she gave birth to: a beautiful human girl that would grow and become my entire life." She whispered softly at the end and leaned in ever so slowly, meeting my eyes just once before brushing her lips against mine.

I whimpered. Alice made me a mess of nerves that I could never contain. I was happy, warm and content with her at the same time I was needy, lustful and excited. Then you could top that off with the fact that I still got the nervous butterfly feeling in my stomach simply by a look from her, let alone those sweet lips pressed against mine. She was heaven.

Her lips parted slowly and I felt her tongue ease out of its cavern to just barely graze over my top lip in a ridiculously slow stroke. We both groaned at the sensation. _**The things you do to me, Ali**._ I slid my hand behind her neck, holding her close to me while the other gripped her hip gently, stroking the soft skin at her waist under her shirt.

Her tongue melded with mine before pulling back and slipping under my upper lip slowly causing me to grunt and tighten the grip on her petite waist. My other hand threaded through the silky hair at her neck.

_**I can never be sated with you, baby**. _She whimpered and pulled back, resting her forehead against mine. After a couple slow deep breaths our eyes opened and met. "I'm so insanely in love with you, Isabelle" she whispered and nuzzled her nose against mine, causing me to sigh and smile.

My chest constricted at her heartfelt confession. I knew she was in love with me, just as she knew I felt the same about her. It didn't change the fact that hearing her whisper those words and say my given name with such reverence made me completely come apart inside.

Perhaps I was soaking it in too long, for she spoke with a slightly broken voice, "Does it bother you that I choose to call you Isabelle?"

**_ I gripped my stomach as a fierce pain shot through my mid-section. "Bella, are you alright?" It was Alice's beautiful voice that was pulling me out of my mind and back into the present. "Should I call her Isabelle?" She murmured softly to Esme. I could hear the worry in her tone._**

**"_No." I replied as I breathed deeply and sat myself up. "I am Bella now...Isabelle is still a part of me but I fear she died long ago."_**

**_Esme shook her head softly, "No. She may be lost...confused and uncertain, but she is very much still alive in you. You only have to find her...to find yourself."_**

I could see the scene replaying in her mind clearly. She was thinking of the first time we talked at her home.

She didn't have to clarify her question. She was asking me if I would prefer her use my current alias to the humans, Isabella, or Bella. I could feel the uncertainty coming off of her and again my chest constricted in fear that she could be hurting by worrying over this.

"Alice," I began, cupping her cheek in my hand and smiling while I lost myself in her eyes, "You have no idea just how intensely I feel about my given name." I paused, wanting to make sure I expressed myself clearly, "I know you're worried about this but you shouldn't be. I love hearing you speak my name, my true name with such love and devotion. I've never felt the way I do about you. Ever. I loved Elizabeth, she was my childhood friend and my first love. But she wasn't meant to become my world. _You_ were, and you are."

She smiled a small smile and brushed her lips with mine once again, "Sweet talker."

I grinned and wrapped my arms around her tightly breathing in her delectable scent and sighing deeply.** _As much as I don't want to..._**

"I know. We should get back and go over what we've figured out with Carlisle." Alice spoke and stood up, holding her hand out to help me up.

Just as I stood up and we began to walk back towards the house, Alice's frame froze and her eyes clouded over in a vision. I paused and opened my mind to hers. Another joy of our relationship, I could now experience her visions with her, while still being able to protect her should anything happen while she's lost within one.

"_It's a pleasure to finally meet you Carlisle Cullen. Aro and various members of the Volturi guard have spoken of you throughout the decades and were kind enough to enlighten me on your strange diet and I so hoped I would get the chance to meet your acquaintance. " A dark long haired man, who looked of Russian decent, spoke casually, his red eyes gleaming. _

"_I didn't realize I was the talk of the guard...," Carlisle spoke gently yet appeared a bit weary. He held out his hand to shake the man's hand._

_ "Forgive my manners, my name is Demitrius."_

Alice's eyes refocused and turned to me, squeezing my hand. "I don't know when," she began as I pulled on her hand gently and we took off towards the house. **_If this is happening now you can't just rush in there! We don't know his purpose._**

I knew she was right. **_Okay here's the plan. You'll go on in just in case the events are already unfolding and he's there. I'll stay far enough away that he won't catch my scent but we should still be able to communicate. We'll feel it out as we go._**

Alice nodded and squeezed my hand tightly, **_I hope I get there before his arrival so I can have a chance to tell Carlisle what we've discovered. We may very well know what his reasoning is for being around Forks every few years._**

**_._**

**_._**

**_._**

**And there you have it. Love it, hate it? Questions, comments?**

**Thanks for reading. ;)**

**Nickole  
**


	27. Ch 22 Experiement Gone Wrong

**A/N: Hey everyone. **

**Yes I realize I have been ridiculous with the amount of time before this update and for that I sincerely apologize. Between life, work and my obsession with READING rather than writing lately... well yeah. :P That and playing Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2. Yes I know, it's really no excuse but it is what it is eh? I hope you all enjoy this next bit. We're starting to get down to business now with what's been going on in Isabelle's life and what's to come. Enjoy!**

**As always, I don't own Twilight, yadda yadda yadda... just borrowing for a while.  
**

.

**CH 22 – Experiment Gone Wrong...in so many Right Ways.**

We made it to the edge of the Cullen property moments later. With a soft kiss and a mental **_I love you_**, Alice took off towards the house as I skirted around their property line. I turned myself over to every sense I had trying to feel out our arrival. _My vampire father._ I sighed and shook my head trying to focus on my surroundings and not my racing mind. As I crouched low against the trunk of a tree, I closed my eyes and concentrated. I could hear all the sounds around me, smell the scents of my family and humans near the road, but nothing unusual. I opened my mind further and could hear Alice speaking rapidly to Carlisle and the rest of the family about her vision and our thoughts on why Dimitrius was making an appearance.

That's when I sensed it. Sensed him. I was hidden in the trees on the west side of the Cullen's property when the feather-light touch of fast feet came running from the east. _Alice_. I tensed and even though she couldn't see or feel me, she knew and relayed the news.

If I hadn't been keeping my senses open, I might have gotten lost in concentration watching him stroll up to the Cullen's front door with a smug look on his face. But I was prepared for anything. At least, I thought I was. Until I smelt her. I could never forget that scent. It was the smell of my childhood, of hugs given and tears wiped away with her apron. "Mother." I turned and locked eyes with the woman I hadn't seen since I was fifteen. That was the year she took off with Dimitrius, or so I assumed. The year before a broken heart caused me to phase for the first time, killing my first love. Two years before my I heard of my father's death. Well, they say bad things happen in three's right?

"Isabelle," she started as she took a step forward to approach me but stopped as I raised my hand to her. "Honey..."

"Don't." I swallowed the venom that had pooled in my mouth at my anger and felt an involuntary shiver course through me when I stared at her blood red eyes. "Don't pretend that you still care for me after all this time."

She actually looked upset at my words. "But of course I still care for you, you're my daughter." I could feel her eyes prying into my own.

"I am, and yet a lifetime later and you don't seem shocked that I'm still alive..." I let out a sarcastic laugh, "and I suppose I'm not shocked that you are either. And not a day older from the last time I saw you."

She nodded, "I know you have a lot of questions, Isabelle." She took a cautious step forward but didn't advance further than the four feet of space between us. "If you'll let me, I'd like to explain."

"Dimitrius changed you, he's here now, inside, talking with the Cullen's." Her eyes widened slightly but gave no other indication of my claim being accurate. "Did you know what happened to me? What I am?" I tried to reign in my hurt and anger, but I knew she could see it.

"I-" she stopped and lowered her eyes, taking an unneeded breath before raising them again to lock onto my own. She looked at them questioningly, but didn't ask. "I knew you were special, but only Dimitrius knew how special you would be. You aren't the first he's created."

This time it was my eyes that widened, "I'm not the first..." I trailed off, letting my mind wonder.

She shook her head. "No, there are others. Since he changed me, he couldn't try again with me, so he did with others. Much to my annoyance."

I snorted and rolled my eyes at her, "And I'm sure that's how Charlie felt every time you took off into the arms of other men for company rather than his own." I glared at her, still angry at her promiscuous ways that hurt my true father all those years ago.

"I can't take back what I've done, but I'm not like that anymore. " She paused and took another cautious step towards me.

"It doesn't matter to me how you are anymore. I just want to know if you knew what I was...when you left. I was fifteen! I needed my mother. And you just took off." The pain was evident in my voice and I mentally cursed myself for it. __

_**Bella?**_ I could hear Alice checking on me, she must have picked up on my emotions. _**I'm alright Alice. My...mother, is here with me. See if your family can stall Dimitrius longer while I talk to her.**_ I heard her agreement and her love flow through to me as I focused again on the woman in front of me. She had her head tilted slightly.

"I did. But he did not. I left to protect you." She wrung her hands in front of her as she glanced around briefly before pausing, "I know it probably doesn't seem that way, but I did."

I nodded my head. I couldn't stop myself from believing her. My mother had never lied to me, and was always good to me, even if she wasn't faithful to my father and left me when I needed her the most. "What were you protecting me from?" I knew the answer, but I wanted her to tell me for herself.

"I was protecting you from Dimitrius...and the Volturi." She admitted, dropping the bomb effectively in my lap. After my time with the Cullen's I knew who the Volturi were, and what they were about. If she felt the need to protect me from them, what I was about to learn couldn't be good.

"Why?" I grit my teeth and mentally called out to my mate. _**Alice...**_ I knew at that moment she was excusing herself and would be at my side in moments. I felt her flitter to my side and lace her left hand with my right, and her right hand holding onto my upper forearm.

My mother seemed shocked at her sudden appearance at my side, and even more amazed that I didn't so much as flinch at her arrival. She narrowed her eyes at Alice before looking back to me. "Answer my question. Anything you say can be shared with her- she'd hear it all later anyway." I stated and squeezed Alice's hand tighter.

She paused before accepting my request and continued speaking, "I was protecting you from Dimitrius and the Volturi because if they knew, what I knew, then they would have come after you much sooner. And they would have found you."

Alice had stiffened at the mention of the Volturi and I gently rubbed her hand with my thumb. "And what is it that you knew?"

"I'm sure at this point you know that Dimitrius has been curious as to if you were half human, half vampire." Off my nod she continued, "He's made many over the last century. Some lived, some didn't. It really depends on the human he chooses, if they can survive carrying the child, and the conditions in which they did. Those who were in the vampire's care never survived. They died near the end of their term, or in child birth. Those who were left with their human families survived it. Then they took the child away, who grew to full maturity at a rapid pace. Approximately six to seven years after birth they would reach full maturity and stop aging. A perfect blend of human and vampire. They had a heartbeat, though were not as cold yet still unable to be harmed. They can sustain themselves on blood or human food , though they prefer blood."

She stopped allowing us to soak in this information. I noticed her gaze flicker back to Alice and our entwined hands. The protective stance Alice had angled towards me didn't escape her notice and I could see a slight twinge of a smile tug at her lips. "And what about me? Why am I so different?"

"Dimitrius got called back to Italy shortly after your conception. I didn't see him for a few years. Once he came back through, he was startled to see that the baby he created with me, which should have been nearly matured was still just a child. He chalked it up to it being something to do with me that something just didn't take. When he kept returning each year, I knew he was checking up on you, but each year he saw you growing as an ordinary human girl. It was then he confided in me what he was looking for in you. I was able to convince him that you were still just a human girl, with no vampiric traits. He had the proof first hand as he had observed you over the years. Something in him called to me, and I to him. That was when he asked me to come back with him and he would make me immortal. I couldn't say no. I loved him, still do, despite not approving of what he does for the Volturi." She sighed and glanced off in the direction of the Cullen's home.

"So he's what, the evil scientist of the Volturi? Creating cross breeds of humans and vampires?" I shook my head as I couldn't believe what I was hearing. "So what happened, I was a failed experiment so you took off with him? How was that protecting me?"

"Don't you see, Isabelle? Obviously you are a vampire now...he will know it worked and he will want you back in Italy with the rest."

It was at this point that Alice spoke, "But you said it yourself, Bella didn't age and change as the others did, how can he be sure it worked and she wasn't simply changed by one of us?" That was a good point, I hadn't thought of that.

She smiled, "We can try to convince him of that, but it will be hard at best. He just has a knack for knowing things, especially when he's being lied to."

"If that's true, how does he not already know about me? How did you know about me when you left with him if I grew as an ordinary human child?"

Alice's eyes widened as a thought occurred to her, "And even if you managed to lie to him, and for him to believe you, how would you hide it from Aro if you've lived with them all these years? He would have every thought that entered your mind from a single touch of your hand..."

Renee licked her lips and closed the small gap of space between us. Alice and I both tensed slightly but soon relaxed at her soft smile. "You see Isabelle, you are not the only unique case here. And it's not entirely your fault that we're back here. After I was turned, Dimitrius took me back to meet his coven. I met Aro straight away and from the moment he touched me he knew I was different. You see, I have a gift. No one can read my thoughts, or do any type of harm to me through mental means. Jane, one of Aro's finest of his guard members, has the ability to inflict mass amounts of pain. At least, you think it is, but truly it is an assault on your mind. She makes you think you're suffering. Neither of their abilities work on me. They never have. Which is how I've managed to keep you a secret. However, I wasn't aware that you were still alive. I simply hoped it was true."

"A Shield. You can block all mental means of any gifts." Alice raised her eyes to meet mine. _**Which is why I only saw Dimitrius and not her. Which also means Edward won't be able to read her mind.**_

I nodded ever so slightly to her and turned my attention back to my mother who was smiling.

"You two have the gift also." Off our confused look she shook her head, "Well, Isabelle possibly has some mental shield as well being my daughter, but I was referring to the mating bond. You can speak to each other telepathically can't you? Just like Caius and Felix."

I stiffened slightly. Renee may be my mother but I'm not sure how much about us I wanted her to know at this point. As if reading my thoughts she put my worries to rest. "Don't worry, your secret is safe with me. And as far as how I knew you were different...I've known since you were a toddler. No, you didn't have any traits of vampires as we had none around us except for the few visits from Dimitrius. But that wasn't what tipped me off."

I was growing frustrated with this entire conversation. I wanted answers and I wanted them now. I began to tremble as my anger started to bubble to the surface. Alice immediately stepped in front of me, blocking my view of my mother and put her hands on either side of my face and stared intently into my eyes. _**Isabelle**_ she whispered to me and I closed my eyes and shared part of my emotions with her until I was able to stop trembling and open my eyes once again. She grinned at me knowingly and pressed a delicate kiss upon my lips before stepping back and resuming her place at my side.

"I see you've found a way to control the other part of you." My mother smiled and nodded as if answering an internal question only she could hear. "I've known what you were, since you were three. That was the first time you phased into a tiny wolf cub."

.

**Questions, comments? I really hope you guys enjoyed this and thank you so much to those of you who are still reading. I have a feeling it may not be many of you anymore. **** Anyway, I'll do my best not to make the next one take quite so long. **

**And I do realize my updates are short...I apologize. It's just how I roll. *snickers***

**Please review and tell me what you think!**

**~Nickole**


	28. Ch 23 Previously on Springer

**If I've said it once, I've said it a thousand times, I AM SO SORRY for the delay in updates. Please know, that I will NOT leave this unfinished. You have my promise on that. However, it could be weeks in between updates. **** Forgive me?**

**As usual, I sadly, own nothing. I just borrow the Twilight characters from SM for my own personal amusement. :P**

..

A very special thanks to** Jezikial**, for catching some POV errors! Thank you thank you thank you!

.

* * *

**CH 23 – Previously on Springer..  
****

* * *

  
**

"_I've known what you were, since you were three. That was the first time you phased into a tiny wolf cub."_

_

* * *

_

Is she shitting me right now? I mean seriously! 'Today on Springer'- _**Isabelle...**_ Alice chastised me mentally but I could see the beginnings of a smirk tugging at her lips. I couldn't help but roll my eyes as I again focused on my mother seriously. "By all means continue. Don't leave us hanging."

She nodded and turned her back on us, something vampires didn't do unless they trusted their company, and took a slow unneeded breath. "So yes, the first time you phased, you were three. Your father was out in the fields helping the neighbours while you and I were home alone. You were sitting in the living area playing with a wooden toy your father had made you with various holes cut into it in various shapes."

* * *

_ Isabelle is sitting on the hardwood floor of a small home with a puzzled look on her face. Picking up a small square block of wood she tries to press it into the circular hole of the larger wooden block in front of her. Her brow furrows even more when she tries several more times, banging the block on the hole, yet it will not fall through.  
_

"_What's wrong there pretty baby?" Renee coos to her daughter as she lowers herself down to the floor with her. Isabelle looks up at her mother with pleading eyes before turning her gaze back to the toy. Renee smiles softly as she picks up the round wooden ball and holds it in front of her baby girl. Seeing she has her attention, she slowly places it over the round hole and drops it in. Baby Isabelle claps and laughs happily. "Here, now you try." Renee holds up a square block for her daughter to take.  
_

_ Isabelle looks at the block for only a moment before grabbing it and trying, yet again, to place it in the circular hole her mother just used with the ball. When she can't get it to go in, she grunts in frustration and throws the block down, her eyes pooling with tears, yet none fall.  
_

"_Oh baby, look, watch Momma," Renee starts as she grabs the thrown square and again slowly shows her daughter to try the square hole. Isabelle takes the block and it falls effortlessly through the square hole. Her eyes light up and she laughs and claps again merrily. "See, not so hard, you got it!" Renee exclaims to her excited daughter as she kisses her forehead and stands up, going back to the stove to finish dinner.  
_

_ Isabelle rounds up her blocks, crawling over to the round one that has rolled a few feet away before getting up her two shaky legs and walking the short distance back to her toy. She then lowers and falls, not so gracefully, back to her bottom and starts to work with a pensive expression on her little face. She grabs the round ball and easily places it into the round hole. She laughs and claps as she grabs the square block, again putting it into the proper place and watching as it falls through. Again she claps and laughs. Renee smiles at her daughter's success as she continues stirring the soup on the stove. _

_Isabelle again rounds up her blocks, only this time she tries to force the round ball into the square slot and it falls off to the side. Not to be swayed, she again picks it up, and bangs it on the square slot trying to force its entry. Again, she throws the ball down when it doesn't comply. Turning to the small square block, she picks it up and tries it against the round hole, again with no success. After banging a few times, she begins to shake as small tears of frustration form in her eyes. You can see she doesn't understand why one will work, but the other will not. They are close to the same size, so why should they not? With a furious wail she throws the block hard against the far wall, much harder than a small child should be able to throw and begins to tremble.  
_

_ Renee, hearing the commotion turns to look at her baby as she dries her hands on the bottom of her apron. She begins to walk towards her daughter when a strangled sound between a frustrated cry and a whimper of pain escapes her baby and the small trembles quickly escalate into full blown tremors and her baby is no more, as in her place, is a small whimpering wolf cub._

* * *

Renee turned back to us and waited for us to take in the information. She watched as Alice's eyes looked into my own, trying to gauge my reaction. I was frozen, and I could feel my eyes darken more than they were moments ago as I fixed a glare on my mother.

"You mean to tell me, that the first time I phased I was _three_ and because I was too dumb to figure out how my play blocks worked?" I shook my head and looked down to the ground below. I could feel Alice's grip on my hand tighten and her right hand gently rub soothing motions up and down my arm. I closed my eyes, feeling only her and tried to relax, but I was frustrated.

Glancing back up to my mother I took in her expression. "So then what, when and how did I change back? Was that the only time? Did anyone else know or ever see me?" I fired off the questions racing through my sharpened mind one at a time. I couldn't help but think in the back of my mind of how dumb I must have been as a child for something like that to happen. ****

**_You were just a babe, Isabelle; you're one of the smartest people I know._** Alice whispered into her mind. I sighed and squeezed her hand in acknowledgement as she waited for my mother to answer my questions.

"I must admit, I was shocked and frozen in my place. I don't know how long it took me to snap out of it, but the sounds of those whimpers coming from the cub, you, tore at my heart. I finally approached your side to have you stand and bury your small furry dark brown head into my apron and just whimper. It's like you knew what had happened and were so scared." Renee sighed and glanced at Alice. She smiled as she took her in, holding tight to my hand and arm. I knew she could see the love reflected in both our stances and the looks we gave each other.

"I did the only thing a mother could possibly think to do to calm you. I picked you up and sat down in the rocking chair and just held you, rubbing your small body and talking to you. I kept telling you I loved you, that Momma wasn't mad, and that everything was going to be alright. In a matter of minutes I was no longer holding a wolf cub, but my baby girl again. I wish I could explain the look in your eyes at that moment." Renee's eyes watered, but the tears wouldn't fall. "You had this expression, of pure wonder in your eyes. It was like at _that_ precise moment you knew something remarkable had happened to you." She again crossed the distance and stood toe to toe with her daughter and her mate. "You never had a problem with the blocks again." She smiled and laughed softly.

I rolled my eyes but couldn't help but smirk and let my defences down when I too heard Alice giggle softly beside me. **_I'm glad you're enjoying this._** I thought and squeezed Alice's hand to let her know that I was only playing with her.

"But to answer your other questions," her mother continued, "No, it wasn't the only time, but yes, I was the only one that knew." She raised her hand slowly, watching for a negative reaction. When she saw none, she gently cupped her daughters left cheek and smiled, "I was too worried about what would happen to you if anyone knew. I didn't want them to take you away from me, or to hurt you because you were different." She whispered softly and smiled when she felt her daughter lean into her touch. "Oh my beautiful daughter..."

**_You know you want to...don't let both of you suffer by denying what you both need, _**Alice spoke into my mind. I squeezed my lovers hand before letting go and taking my mother into my arms and hugging her tightly. I hugged her as tightly as I could, knowing that I wouldn't hurt her. I was trying to hug away the last 85 years even though I knew that was impossible.

"Does he know?" I whispered softly as we pulled back from the hug. "Anything about me?" I had to know what this man knew. I was confident Edward was hearing his thoughts and would know everything he was thinking, but I had to know myself for not only my safety and that of Alice's...but for my mother's as well.

"I couldn't hide my reaction from him when I came across your scent." She lowered her eyes in shame, "It would have done more harm than good to try and deny it. Be that as it may, he knows you are in the area. Given that he already knew of the Cullen's, he figured since he could smell them all over town that the chance of you being in their coven was a good one. He was relentless in finding out how you were still alive, if your change took that much longer, or if you had been changed by one of them."

"How did you know it was my scent?" I asked. Sure, some of my human scent could have been lingering, but according to Alice and the rest of the family, even though I have the appealing scent as any vampire, mine is uniquely different. I'm guessing that is in part to my heritage.

"A mother could never forget anything about her child. You always had a very soothing scent as a child, as most children do. However, after you phased that first time, it changed. Not a huge difference, but just enough that I could tell a difference. It was still very beautiful, but a bit more...wild I guess I would put it. Less of the baby powder and soft smell and a bit more of a fresh air scent. You still have that, only magnified now."

I nodded, as it did make sense. "So what exactly, does he know? What does he expect to happen?" I asked and felt Alice stiffen beside me. I turned to her to see her eyes had clouded over. I immediately dropped all of my other senses and focused solely on my loves mind, pressing my forehead against hers, welcoming her sight into my mind.

"_I know that she's here, Carlisle. The scent my mate and I came across is all over your home. My wife, I'm sure, has already found her. Do not feel you need to protect her. I am, after all, her father. I wouldn't harm my own child."_

"_That wasn't a thought in my mind; however you must understand that she is part of our family now. She is mated with my youngest daughter, Alice." Carlisle spoke gently._

"_Ah yes, the small pixie like girl. Very beautiful choice my daughter has chosen. But please, if you won't tell me how she came to be part of this coven, I must take my leave and find my mate and find out for myself."_

I shook my head quickly and felt my eyes dilate as I refocused on Alice coming out of her vision. "A few minutes, maybe less." She spoke quickly and scanned her eyes towards the trees in the direction of our home.

I focused on my mother, "We need to know, quickly, what he knows. Alice has just had a vision of him coming out to look for us as Carlisle and the rest of the family have been avoiding most of his questions." I fixed my gaze on her, "Please, you owe me this much. I don't want to walk blindly into anything that can affect me or Alice." I hesitated only a second, "Or the rest of our family."

I could see the word family, rather than coven, made her flinch just barely, but she did not hesitate.

"He doesn't know of your ability to phase. He believes that it possibly just took longer for you to turn. Honestly, my best guess is that he feels you grew to age of maturity, and then stopped aging and the rest took over. But then, that is my guess, I'm not sure exactly what happened once I left you." She finished softly, and guiltily.

I nodded. "Come, let's head back and deal with this. I'll fill you in on what's happened to me the last 85 years as well as the current situation Alice and the rest of the family find ourselves in with the local werewolves."

If she was shocked at my reply and the mention of werewolves, she didn't show it. She simply took my offered hand and together the three of us ran back to our home. To face one of my, I swallowed the venom pooling in my mouth, fathers.

* * *

**UPDATED: Resonse/Clarification:  
**

**- _In response to a feedback I just received about Bella's 3yr old antics being that of a 1yr old, and that I needed to do my research, I just wanted to add this, which I have replied to that reviewer: It was purposly written this way, that Isabelle aka Bella, was a little "underdeveloped" so one might say. I never said she couldn't walk and talk, but that she preferred, as some children do, to crawl rather than walk. I still wanted to play it up as "Bella" and being clumsy and quiet/reserved as even a toddler. However, she was unsure of herself and shaking on her little legs. I didn't go into detail, but that will play into the coming chapters. Hence why I added Isabelle feeling "dumb" as a child due to what her mother told her with the flashback._**

**_Yes, I'm aware most three year olds can walk around, run around, fall down, talk, and gibber gabber, but that's not how Isabelle was as a child. But anyway, it will come to play in the later chapters and hopefully make sense to everyone. :)  
_**

**So, what did everyone thing? Please don't be shy, let me know! I appreciate it, even if it's just a "GOOD" lol. :)**

**Thanks!**

**Nickole  
**


	29. Long Overdue AN

Um…. Hi?

I guess I should start off by saying…I AM SO VERY SORRY! I can't believe I let this story sit as long as I have!

I'm flabbergasted, honestly, that anyone is even still reading/reviewing/adding to story alert/author alert, etc. That is truly amazing to me! Thank you all so very much!

I realized today, after a review and several story alerts came through my email, that it has been one year today since I last updated! It kind of jolted my brain out of my ass to say the least.

With that said, I'm going to bust my ass this week to get you guys an update. (for those of you still bothering to read!) For those of you who have given up, I don't blame you, but I am sorry.

I always planned (and still do) to finish this story. I never meant to let it go for so long. I blame Faberry and real life. lol

See you soon! (hopefully!)

Nickole


	30. Ch 24 You ARE the Father

**Alright so - now you will see why I dreaded this chapter! I hate a lot of dialogue with no action or resolution! lol But this one had to be done before we can get to some of the more interesting stuff.**

**As always, let me know what you think, good or bad. :P Just be nice!**

**.**

* * *

CH 24 - **Previously on Maury Povich. You ARE the father!**

**.**

* * *

The three of us made it back to the house within minutes. Upon entering the common room my mother dutifully went to her husbands side, but not without giving me a small sad smile.

"Well now, if it isn't the infamous Isabelle Swan." Dimitrius stepped forward and extended his hand.

I glanced at the offered hand briefly before glancing to Carlisle who gave me a small nod. Keeping Alice slightly behind me I closed the gap and grasped his hand in mine. Part of me felt like I should feel something, anything…considering this man was a 1/3 my father but I felt nothing. I felt the same hard hand that I would feel from any vampire that wasn't my family. "Dimitrius."

Dimitrius gave a small laugh and grinned. "So formal in your greeting Isabelle. I'm already certain you and your mother have caught up so to speak, therefore we know who we are to each other." He had an almost teasing glint in his eyes. I didn't like it.

"Regardless of the facts of my heritage, that does not make you my father." I spoke firmly as I stepped back putting a few feet of space between us. Alice secured her position to my side and left herself slightly behind me. _Thank you._ I felt her grip my hand in acknowledgement. She knew I needed to feel as if she was somewhat shielded behind me.

"I see this isn't going to go anywhere near the way I had hoped. Why do you already have such a hatred for me Isabelle? You do not know me. Is it simply because of your mother?" He asked turning to look at his mate. My mother's eyes widened but she didn't take her eyes off me.

"My mother loves you. Do I blame you for taking her from me? No, I don't. She made her own choice to leave with you. Although should she had said no, I can't be certain you wouldn't have forced her to go with you now can I?" I pinned him with my gaze and noticed his eyes flicker briefly. I had him.

"I see. I won't lie, you're correct. Had she told me no, I would have taken her anyway." He turned to face my mother, her gaze hardened. Apparently she hadn't known he would have forced her to go with him. "So let's get on with this shall we? Obviously you are a vampire, a member of this…interesting golden-eyed coven and your mate is Alice, the future seeing young lady at your side. Now that we know those facts, how about we get to the finer details, daughter."

I tensed and grit my teeth. The nerve of this mother- _Isabelle…._ Alice whispered in my mind and rubbed my upper arm with her right hand as she continued to squeeze my hand with her left. "I am **not** your daughter. I'm your experiment."

He exhaled and shook his head. "Is there really a difference? You're here now, as you are because of me aren't you?" He was testing me. Now was the time to decide to be truthful, not knowing what he would do with the knowledge, or to lie.

"Who I am and how I am, doesn't concern you and has little to do with you." Not an outright lie, but not the truth either. _Good call sweetheart, we don't want to tip our hand too early knowing that he can sense lies._ I squeezed her hand a bit tighter. He caught the movement.

"To an extent, I'll agree." He glanced back up at our eyes. "But you see, here's the inquiry. Did you simply stop aging once you reached adulthood, or were you changed by one of the coven here? Another vampire passing through?" He paced a few steps towards the window and back again. "One would think I would be curious to the golden eyes of yours, considering the red I see in them. One would think, maybe they feed on humans and animals alike. I am not that one. You see, you have a lot of the similar gifts, the mating connection that Caius and Felix have, so that is easily explained. Although, I haven't seen their eyes like this. They prefer human blood so perhaps that is why, no chance for any change." He stepped up within a foot of me and I could almost feel pressure in my eyes from his stare. "You feed off of each other." It wasn't a question.

I wanted to test out whether or not he could tell if I lied but this wasn't one to try with. "Yes." He kept staring for a few seconds more, and I could swear I saw a slight flicker of his eyes but it passed quickly. I wasn't sure what to make of it. Did he not believe me when I spoke the truth?

"And here is the real interesting part to this. Vampires do not feed from each other. Sure, in a moment of intense passion it can arise, but not in a full feeding capacity. Our blood doesn't do anything for us, there's no gain, no excitement from it. Many have tried, and then they just don't anymore. But you two…" He trailed off with a glint in his eye. "That's not the case for you is it?"

I couldn't help but let my eyes flicker to Alice's. _I'm not seeing anything and I don't know what he's getting at…_ she growled out in my mind. "Our relationship is very new. Alice is the first-" I shook my head, "Alice is the only mate I've ever had. I've never taken another, therefore it's all very intense and I'll connect with her in any way possible."

He stared at me, eyes hardened. "Perhaps. I can't help but just wonder, how much of your human blood remains in your system. Perhaps…there is more to you than meets the eye."

_Back me up Alice. I have an idea._ "The same could be said for you. My mother already mentioned your plans. Weren't you going to bring those up?" I felt the change in Alice and knew she was focusing as if in a vision. I knew she had everyone's attention and she continued pretending. My girl knew me well. I gripped her hand and faced her for a few moments when she blinked and made eye contact with me. Her eyes slightly wide and she set her jaw. I turned back to Dimitrius. "Well, lets here it. You have plans to convince me back to Volterra, yes?"

I knew in the next moment, I could lie to this man just as my mother could. Whatever bit of her that gave her the shield she possess against mental attacks and intrusions, some part of that was mine as well. And as long as Alice and I shared our mental link, she was protected also. He bought the whole thing. I had to be completely sure though. _Edward – try to lie to him._

"Volterra? You want to take her away from her mate? From us?" Edward asked, a bit louder than he needed to. "I will consult with Aro on this. He owes me a favour, this won't be allowed."

Dimitrius had the nerve to smirk. "Is that right? I call your bluff young mind reader." He knew Edward was lying, which just proved my theory. Three of us in this room could lie to him, so all we have to do is keep the others in the dark and they'll be safe. "Now Isabelle, to answer your question, yes. Yes, I was instructed upon finding you to invite you back to Volterra to meet the Volturi. This invitation of course, would now be extended to your mate as well. We aren't completely heartless you know."

I snorted. I didn't meant to, but I couldn't help it. "Maybe not. But since this is an invitation- that means it can be accepted or denied. We deny your request at this time." I held his eyes, "Perhaps in the future we will consider the request."

"I suppose we will take our leave now. Renee?" He turned towards my mother and she nodded. She looked to me with a look of longing and then flittered out the door. So much for a goodbye. "Don't think this is over Isabelle. The Volturi will want to meet you. You can beat around the metaphorical bush all you want about how you came to be a vampire, but I will find out the truth. Whether it comes from you, this coven or elsewhere." I felt the threat behind his words.

"Why does it matter? I am what I am, and have been for many years." I dared him to lie to me. "What gain do you have in this? Presenting a vampire to the Volturi. I have no special abilities, I can't read minds and I don't get visions. What is it you think I can provide for you?"

"Proof." And with that, they were gone.

I turned to face the rest of the family and held Alice close to me. They all looked around to each other, trying to make sense of what just took place.

"Proof of what?" Emmett was the first to voice the question.

"You may have proved that you can lie to him and shield Alice at the same time, but there's more he knows that he's not letting on. Even to your mother. He's hiding something." Edward spoke and looked at Carlisle. "This is far from over with him."

Carlisle nodded, "I sensed the same thing myself." He turned to me and looked into my eyes regretfully. "I know this isn't what you're going to want to hear, but once we are sure they are clear of the area, perhaps you should spend some time with the pack. I have a feeling not only will we need their help, but that they have more information as well."

I didn't like it. I didn't like it one bit but deep down part of me knew what he was getting at. Of all the worries this brought to my mind, only a few stood out among the others. Would I start becoming a human that could phase while with them, how long would it take, and would it be reversible.

Alice wrapped her arms around my neck and held me close. _I'm with you whatever you decide love. No matter what happens, I know this bond and this link between us won't be severed._

* * *

**Coulda gone better, coulda been worse. You decide.**

**Until next time!**

**Nickole**


End file.
